Reply to Just back-burnered my career

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op I did this and regretted it, but my mom became more abusive with dementia. Never regretted sacrifices for my kids or husband, one of whom has SN. When it got to the point my health was worse than hers we got outside professionals to manage everything in her care. They were trained to also advocate and negotiate with memory care. It’s all about the relationship. If you are doing this out of guilt only and you are resentful look at options. If it feels right and you were raised with a lot of love and support then cherish your time and I hope when the time is right new opportunities are there. It’s tough.[/quote]

Yes, I stepped back in all things related to my personal life to care for my mom. It started as a crisis but it quickly became daily 24/7 care. Because we were trying to figure out so many things that were coming at us quickly we didn't have time to sit back and figure out the best path forward. Before I knew it 2.5 years la later I started to get resentful for all the things I had to put on the backburner to ensure my mom's health was maintained. And sure enough - my physical and mental health deteriorated as did my friendships and family relationships. Making things worse money was an issue - so finding supportive care at an affordable price was a challenge.  We are still trying to figure things out but if I could do it all over, the first thing I would have done is find professional care so I wasn't the one managing or giving up my life. While it may sound selfish, the reality is its a neverending role that doesn't get easier. [/quote]

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