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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Before you divorce, stop doing anything that benefits him. No laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc. Don't help him find his car keys, buy a gift for his mother, or make his colonoscopy appointment. No affection or intimacy of course. Treat him like a platonic roommate you found on Craigslist. Then perhaps he will see all you do for him and how much work it is. Maybe he will start to appreciate you. But honestly, I doubt it! You have my blessing to skip straight to divorce if all that sounds unappealing.  :) [/quote]

Op here. I don't do his laundry, just mine and DD's. We outsource with a housecleaner 2x a month, but any other maintenance cleaning, like dishes, wiping down counters, taking out trash, picking up, vacuum, making the bed, etc. he just does not do. Not only that, he stays up late and leaves trash and dishes out when he goes to bed, so I come downstairs at 5am and start my day by picking up cereal bowls and snack wrappers.

He doesn't take DD to activities except the rare occasion I have an after work event. He has nothing to do with DD and school (homework, conferences, paper work, lunch money, etc). Never schedules or attends a dr appt. Never has bought her clothes, certainly couldn't tell you her clothing or shoe size.

There was one day I was WFH and I got DD ready, took her to the bus, came home, started work, worked for 2 hours and he was still sleeping. I waited to see how long he would sleep before realizing HE HAD WORK and I let him go till after 9:30 before I woke him up because then I worried he might miss a meeting and get fired and that would suck more than proving a point.

The only thing he appears to care about is work. He is focused and motivated there, but that's it. I've said multiple times that I can't do it all with the job I have. I'm literally drowning and am so tired.

He doesn't care about affection or intimacy, so that's not even a source of leverage. It feels hopeless.[/quote]

How focused can he be at work if he has trouble waking up on time? [/quote]

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