Reply to S/O: Does talking about negative emotions help you?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So as a guy who doesn’t really understand validating, what is it? Is it different than agreeing? Can you still do it in an honest way if you think the person’s feelings are not in proportion to the issue? (I’m not suggesting telling them they’re wrong; but I might struggle to validate emotions if it means pretending [b]a little deal is a big deal[/b].)[/quote]

So, here you are acting as the arbiter of what sort of emotional response another person should or shouldn't have. You should not do that. It is supremely frustrating and hinders connection. Connection comes from understanding somebody, and the vast majority of people cannot simultaneously understand somebody and pass judgment on how they are reacting.

But the answer to the original question is sometimes. If I'm experiencing a negative feeling, it can be helpful to share it. It can help the feeling, but the more important thing is that it increases my connection with those I confide in. [/quote]

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