Reply to Seeking advice and experiences: Senior parents living separately due to incompatibility

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[quote=Anonymous]Despite your mother’s clear unhappiness, I would bet she will be resistant to any suggestion that she move out and live separately at this point. Your description of your parents is eerily similar to mine, except my father was a dry drunk for decades but the toxic is still toxic in the absence of alcohol. As they aged and his temper became more volatile I lived in greater fear that he would someday lose it and kill my mother with one of his collection of guns - I feared that as a kid, too, but even more with age. My mother would not leave despite her clear unhappiness because she was of a generation that was far too preoccupied with what other people might think, even into older age. My mother instead died 20 years before her genetic heritage would suggest (her mother and grandmother lived into late 90s), I am certain due to the toxic stress of a dysfunctional marriage that takes a real toll on the body.

This thread is an interesting accompaniment to the one about how marriage benefits women. As I said there, I have absolute certainty that many long lived marriages of 40+ years are evidence only of the capacity some women have to endure endless emotional suffering. [/quote]

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