Reply to Why does NOTHING make my mother happy?

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Why does NOTHING make my mother happy?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]My mom is like this.  She definitely has anxiety and depression, but doesn’t want to admit that anything is “wrong” with her, so she needs something external to be wrong so that she can be a victim.  Basically she needs a reason she can point to to explain why she is deeply depressed and also justify needing/expecting everyone to cater to her depression and her anxiety.  It’s a way to avoid responsibility for herself and her emotions and needs.

She is also terrible across-the-board at being aware of her needs and wants.  She basically goes through life pretending to be a completely different person—selfless, laid-back and open.  Then constantly is triggered by everything bc what she actually wants is the opposite of what she claims, but she can never figure that out until the panic starts to set in.

A few examples:
She visited at Thanksgiving, we had several young kids in the mix and nobody wanted to cook so we ordered everything for the big meal.  We asked everybody what they wanted us to include in the order for them, she was given plenty of room to weigh in, we had everything she asked for, she said she was totally fine with everybody having different stuff.  Then when the food arrived and she saw we had ordered a kale salad she had a meltdown because she was afraid we would expect her to eat kale and she didn’t want to.  She talked about it the entire day, including making retching sounds.

One  Christmas, she visited my nephew (the first grandkid).  She is profoundly jealous of his local grandparents and has complained at length about how there are so many photos of them together and she hardly has any photos with the baby, etc.  So we went to take professional Santa pics with her and when we got there she had a meltdown about how unfair to force her to be in a photo because she never looks good in photos etc.

Essentially she doesn’t like who she is so she pretends to be someone else but then she can’t execute.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics