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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DH and I are starting couples therapy this week. Things that I find common that the kids do irk and trigger anger for DH and we’ve decided to start counseling to work on our communication and be better parents. In the latest incident, DH grabbed DD because she was screaming inside and wouldn’t stop after repeatedly being asked. He left marks on her, I took pictures and insisted we need help. DH agrees. I want to be truthful in painting the full picture to our therapist so that we can grow and move forward. My question is would this scenario be something the therapist needs to report as a mandatory reporter? Do you hold back what you disclose in couples therapy?[/quote]

Your priority should be to protect your kids.  Your relationship with your husband is not the priority here.

Your husband needs intense counseling to learn to regulate/control his emotions.  It absolutely is out of bounds to become physical - especially when the target is so much less powerful.  I have no doubt there are multiple instances of this happening between your husband and your kids.  It likely happens between your husband and you. In addition to individual counseling for him, your kids would likely benefit from it as well.

You and your husband should also take some parenting classes and implement a more effective discipline structure.  I've got kids with SN and completely understand getting frustrated/annoyed with their lack of compliance.  Reacting the way your husband does (you said this was the latest incident which means there's a pattern) is a klaxon that radical change is needed.

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