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[quote=Anonymous]This is an interesting question but for me, it's all over the map. I can't document all of my friends, but here are the first few that I thought of because they have kids a similar age (throwing myself in the mix without saying which is me cause why not):

1. High profile marketing exec who quit working and became a SAHM. DH is a Big Law partner and there is really not room in their marriage for another big job. She doesn't really want to go back to another high pressure gig, though she would like to return to work now that kids are in school. She's torn about what though, so for now she's still a SAHM (and great at it, as she was at her job). One kid and probably done.

2. Corporate consultant at executive level, did not quit and has maintained the same job level. Did change companies once after having a child because she wanted to move into a role with fewer idiotic deadlines (she does more sales/RFP and fewer deliverables now), but she also hates current job. However I don't see her ever truly mommy tracking. My wish for her is to start her own business because she'd be amazing at it, but she's risk averse. Not mommy tracked. DH also has a fairly high level job but way less stressful, and he is the primary parent for sure. One kid and definitely done.

3. Another corporate consultant at a high level (not quite as high). Has stayed with her firm and continued to work at the same level. The one difference is that she used to regularly take jobs that would require extended stints in other cities or countries (and has lived all over the world), and now she works out of the home office almost exclusively with only occasional client travel. But I would not say she mommy tracked because it has not impacted her level or income, maybe the prestige factor a bit. She was ready for the change. DH has a low-paying non-profit job and while they share things pretty equally, definitely enables her work travel when she does it. Two kids and done.

4. BigLaw attorney who went in house for quality of life reasons related to motherhood. Still works crazy hours, still travels a lot, but likes her job a lot more and importantly, has more independence in her role and therefore can control where and how she works a lot more (i.e. decide for herself which conferences and events to attend, can arrange to work remotely for longer working vacations in the summer, when they've gone to Hawaii or abroad for a month at a time). Her DH works in government but I honestly don't think he takes the lead on much and wouldn't be surprised if they got divorced. This friend is like a superstar -- she does it all and she does it all well. I truly don't know how she does it -- amazing work ethic and fantastic attitude about everything. Three kids and done.

5. Journalist previously working for pub with an international profile. Went freelance after having first with intention of returning to salaried gig after having second, but had lots of infertility issues and then Covid hit. They've stopped trying for number two and decided to be happy for one, and my friend has stopped talking about going back to a FT position. She's the only one I'd say has mommy tracked, though I really think it had more to do with the stress and burnout from infertility and Covid than with being a mom. She's for sure the primary parent in their family and really makes the most of her time with her kid -- I think she doesn't want to go back full-time because she knows this is her one chance at motherhood and she doesn't want to miss anything. She still works though even won an award last year. But her work sounds pretty part time. I think she's going to write a book in the next few years.[/quote]

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