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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]There are many ways to betray your spouse's confidence in a major way, and infidelity is but one of them[/b]. My husband has not cheated on me, but has done financial and other things that have created a serious rift in our marriage. He has ADHD/ASD, I can't trust him with finances, he refuses to medicate himself, and this is a serious matter.

But I don't want to divorce over it. As you correctly pointed out, why would *I* be the one to initiate costly divorce proceedings (because of course he'd fight me) only to end up with a lower HHI at the end because we need to support two households? To say nothing of finding a compatible partner later!

So no. My kids and I prefer to enjoy the economic and social benefits of staying as a family unit. This person I married is obviously not all bad, otherwise I would leave. He has his good sides. I prefer to take the good with the bad.

I'm in my 40s with teens. ALL the families I know are in this situation, more or less. There's always one spouse that isn't quite measuring up in one way or another, but the advantages of marriage outweigh the disadvantages.

[/quote]

This, all day.

My wife betrayed me in a non-sexual way and I would rather have been cheated on.

But anyway, I choose to stay for now and enjoy the family unit. Maybe I will feel differently when the kids are gone. Life isn't black and white. Divorce only trades one set of problems for another.[/quote]

I realized too late that nmy ex's financial infidelity was a symptom of his dishonesty which eventually led to sexual infidelity. It wasn't that he was paying for dinners out with others or anything like that. He couldn't face his life sexually or financially and was a habitual liar. So just be careful. A new infidelity could pop up.[/quote]

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