Reply to My Dad is Living With Us and I Lost It Tonight

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]He needs anxiety meds. [/quote]

Plus, he is obviously feeling self conscious and guilty for moving in for you bc he feels it's a burden - you built an inlaw suite, you rearranged things to accommodate him, etc. It is manifesting in "worry", anxiety, and criticism (bc we all know when you criticize /put-down others you automatically feel better about your own-self and he needs that self affirmation even if it's at the expense of negative comments).

His rebuke to you shows YOU his true colors- feeling like a burden to you, afraid he'll lose control of (the fear of beingvsent away to a funny farm, cast out to a senior living place) a life he's always been in control of up until 2 months ago, and also personal pride - HE took care of you for 18(+) yrs/been a patriarch/dad knows best/dad has the answers abd now the tables have turned on him  That's very jarring especially for seniors

Does he get out and socialize- a bridge group, Silver Sneakers, bocce ball, history group, involved with a men's group at church, or the like?

Is "part" of the family (as in contributing - helping your/his (grand)kids with himework  shuttling them around, prepping lunch or dinner, etc) or is he just a " +1" (he doesn't play a role/just sits around/doesn't have a good reason to even get up in the morning)?

Curious - is he on any meds that trigger irrational moody side effects? Is there a sliver of depression setting in (is your mom in the picture)? Is he in pain (arthritis getting worse, for example)? Boredom (see seeking control, feeling like an outcast, feeling vulnerable,  above)?[/quote]

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