Reply to My Dad is Living With Us and I Lost It Tonight

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[quote=Anonymous]OP if you think you can reason with your dad or “set boundaries” that will change his behavior, you may as well quit now and move him to assisted living. Seriously. That’s not going to work. If he is inclined to tell you not to walk the dog at night and you think asking him not to or explaining why it’s safe is going to make him stop…boy oh boy. It’s not. Going. To. Work.

You need to stop interacting with your dad like he’s a reasonable adult roommate and start being strategic. Most of the stuff you mentioned falls firmly into the  “deflect and ignore” camp for me. If you don’t think you can do that, having him live with you is going to have a major negative effect on your life. Plan to change where he lives.

Anyone who has cared for someone with any level of cognitive decline can tell you that these anxieties, annoying fixations, irrational unhelpful ness, extreme and genuine emotions like despair and anger etc are part of it. They just are. If you’re not up for it (zero judgment) you need to move him out. It will only get worse. The right meds might help for a short period but one rarely has just the right meds for long. [/quote]

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