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[quote=Anonymous]I’m so sorry op. This must be so difficult.

I used to yell a lot. What has helped me stop yelling is to know my triggers, two of which are being tired and hungry! So I have to force myself to get more sleep and snack often. In the moment when the kids are driving me crazy and I can feel the anger start to build, I do sometimes step away for a moment, after I make sure they’re in a safe place. I also sometimes yell that they’re acting like children, which helps me get out some frustration but in a fun way - they think it’s hilarious.

When I start to lose patience with a tantrum I try a mantra like “he’s having a hard time he’s not giving me a hard time.” Sometimes that helps. Also with my older kid, who is 6 so still quite young, I look at her hands. I notice how small they are, they’re still chubby. She is so young. That helps me switch to feeling more empathetic and less angry.

Also, sometimes I yell, and it makes things worse. I’m not perfect. I’m still a good mom. 
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