Reply to How did you know it was time to "break up" with your best friend?

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[quote=Anonymous]Going thru this right now. It kind of hurts.

Age 41, friend is 45. Met when we were 25 and 29 working in NYC biglaw, very similar work lives etc. Our backgrounds/interests were entirely different though yet at that age and for the 10-12 years after, it didn't matter much as we just had a lot of fun. She is much more anti-corporate, civic minded etc., I'm much more - traditional views of success, make $$ etc. She did biglaw for 4 years (to pay off loans) and left for a non profit and a series of solo practice offices because she wanted to represent regular people. I stayed for 10 years and went in house in finance.  We used to talk 1-2x/wk and text many times a week for YEARS, until ~March 2020.

In the last 2 years though no matter what topic comes up, she ALWAYS finds a way to bring it back to how unfair/unequal the world is; racism (we're different races but neither is white); how much wealthy people suck; progressive politics etc. She doesn't say it but she looks down on me for making $$$ rather than going into a helping job + leaving NYC for a better lifestyle/house etc. It's not that we always used to talk about careers/$$$, we didn't. But having someone who only wants to lecture about race/inequality has shown me how different our life views are.

Even recently she texted that she was so happy to see people in HER neighborhood (Harlem) having fun at a block party; I responded - yeah it's nice to see people out and having fun again here too. Her response - well it means more in MY neighborhood because the pandemic has been SO HARD for people here. I get it . . . your avg person in N Arlington tends not to work at Chipotle and teleworked, but my god do we ALWAYS have to discuss how put out certain populations are??

We barely talk now. Haven't spoken by phone in over a year. We'll go 1-2 months w/o texting; I usually break the silence and if she's in the mood we'll have a fun back and forth about TV/sports/whatever just like old times but if she isn't I don't even get a response or get a "K" type of response.[/quote]

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