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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]On a family vacation when I was 8, my parents were fighting and I sat with my dad. My mom looked me dead in the eye and called me a traitor. They fought a lot but this particularly affected my life. My dad was unhappy with my grades and told me to kill myself when I was in college. I was so used to hearing this kind of stuff but now I am beyond sad that my life was like that. I would never talk to my kids this way. [/quote]

This kind of thing was one reason I never wanted children. (My ex agreed to no kids and kind of forced it to happen [at least with the first] anyway and there was a second accident].). I relive the trauma I had every year with every year my kids are the same age. It makes me very sad and unhappy. They don't know this, of course, but it really is very difficult and makes being a parent very emotionally difficult for me. I did not want to relive childhood and think of things that happened to me at particular ages.

I am so sorry you feel this, too. Just knowing you would never do this to your kids means you have not let what happened to you rule your life. Take comfort in the fact that you are a better parent. I know it is hard. I feel more anger toward my parents as years go by because I just can't believe they did what they did now that I am a parent...not only am I reliving it through raising kids, I am now angered by it because I am redminded of it and horrified at the same age I am when they treated me terribly, I would never do such a thing. It is like a double whammy.[/quote]

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