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[quote=Anonymous]we live out of state. it started out as low contact but over the years certain things became more and more difficult so i would allow less and less. i haven't spoken to them over a year. honestly, it's the best it has been. they still reach out for birthdays or holidays and i don't respond.
it depends on your circumstances, which can vary wildly from person to person. it was harder in the beginning, probably because i had a lot of hope that things would get better or improve which was never going to happen. 
also, i felt like a lot of the reason i was holding on was so my kids could have that relationship but my parents were doing the bare minimum with my kids so why should i put myself through hell to keep a relationship that isn't really there? kids are young and rarely saw them so they don't really even know who they are so they have not been affected.
one of the harder things for me is feeling like every one else gets to have those healthy relationships with family. why can't i? i still struggle with that even though i know it isn't true.
obviously, speaking with a good therapist can really help you navigate this situation.
good luck. stay strong.[/quote]

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