Reply to Donor Cycle Failure - doctor recommends moving on to surrogate but that seems premature?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Perhaps you are not ready or willing to have a child by a surrogate? And that is why this makes you so uneasy? There is nothing wrong with that at all.
You don't tell your age today, but probably a bit over 40? You must decide for yourself. The doctor is just there to give advice and his opinion.[/quote]

OP here - I’m 41.  If surrogacy is our only option left then we’d be at the end of the road.  Aside from not being sure if emotionally or financially I could ever be ready for surrogacy - we’re moving to Europe this summer for three years and it’s banned in the country we’ll be living in and the surrounding countries.  Doing another donor cycle in Europe would be an option (and much cheaper than here in the US).

We have the appointment scheduled for the DNA fragmentation test and I’m also going to do a consult for doing a laparoscopy.  I did have a c-section previously and I’ve read that some people have undetected scarring that can interfere with conception.  I just want to cover all bases to see if it’s worthwhile to try donor egg again.

I understand that the doctor is telling me the most likely way to get a baby is surrogacy but I think he should have been advising me on more diagnostic options first before moving onto to surrogacy - instead I had to research it myself and advocate to get more tests done.  Also, I feel like when you’re in the shared risk program they push too quickly to move on to plan B and kick you out of the program.  I was kicked out of the OE shared risk after 3 cycles and he confirmed I would have been kicked out of the donor egg shared risk at this point too - after 1 cycle and 4 FETS (although given the move we didn’t have time to keep going anyway).[/quote]

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