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[quote=Anonymous]He built his life to be a certain way, which didn’t seem to include romantic intimacy. Perhaps he knew that about himself, after so many years of life and experience, and just wasn’t open to that kind of connection. I imagine if he wanted a relationship, or could sustain one, he would have a romantic history beyond the passing liaison from years ago that he spoke about - especially with so many friends and an active social life.

You were vulnerable, for whatever reason, and trying to fill a void. The rapport you had as close colleagues doesn’t necessarily translate to a good romantic partnership - in fact, the way you describe him, it’s very likely he would be a difficult partner...workaholic, perfectionist, perhaps hard to get close to his “rich inner world”, so you would be left wanting.

Perhaps you idealized him because he had traits you admired at a time you were vulnerable and struggling. Rather than focusing on HIM/what may have been going on with him, I would put that laser focus on yourself and consider what might have been going on with YOU at the time (and even now, as the crush is coming back up again). Maybe going through the process of understanding why you were/are vulnerable to/yearning for such a connection will demystify him and lessen the power of his presence in your mind.[/quote]

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