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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is what I'm telling myself this year to get myself through the holiday season.  I actually have two; the third is my mother.  She is throwing one of her usual tantrums the way she likes to around Christmas, refusing to return my texts and calls because she thinks I took too long to tell her we received her package of gifts for the kids.  It's just such insane and stupid behavior.  I used to feel so hurt and rejected by this kind of thing, but now I just tell myself that I have three kids: two who live with me, and a third who lives across the country (thank god).

Her narcissistic and selfish behavior is only my problem if I let it be.  I don't feel hurt when one of my kids throws a tantrum; I shouldn't when my mother does either.[/quote]

I think your response is perfect. Ignore the behavior, and let her reach out to you when she calms down. I agree that her actions are selfish and narcissistic, but the only way to deal with that is to cut her out of your life, and except under certain circumstances, that is extreme. For instance, the parent (my father) I don't have in my life, spent most of my childhood as a raging alcoholic who couldn't have told you which grade I was in at school, let alone had any concern for my well being. My mother (who is much like yours it sounds like)--I would never in a million years deny her access to her grandchildren. It's so cruel and she would have to be 100% toxic and untrustworthy for me to take that step. [/quote]

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