Reply to Coming to terms with my father dying in isolation from covid

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Coming to terms with my father dying in isolation from covid "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here..  I’m not sure if a therapist could tell me anything that would make me feel better. My DHs dad was killed instantly in a car wreck at 75 and of course he was devastated.  His mom died slowly with dementia in her 80s in a home.    I’m not trying to diminish the deaths of his parents but I can’t help feeling that I wouldn’t be so devastated  if my dad died like either of his parents.   Would I?[/quote]

very probably. If it is helpful for you to do thought exercises, then think through what it's like to have the parent die in a car crash (shouldn't have happened so soon but for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, the weather, the other driver, whatever the reason) and a parent die of a lingering disease that robs you of who they are far sooner than it does of their physical presence. I've been through both the sudden death and the lingering death, and they are both sucky, it's just with one you grieve the loss of the person before their body dies (but you feel bad that they were going through a physical and mental trauma before they actually died) and the other you grieve them after the sudden death but feel somewhat relieved that they didn't suffer for a lengthy period even if they lost years of life they might otherwise have had. FWIW, your dad probably understood why no one from his family was there to say goodbye, even if it is an awful thing to go through.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics