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[quote=Anonymous]I second the poster who recommended talking to older women.

I did not tell anyone except one coworker. It was very lonely, but I have a busy and high-intensity job and a fair number of women in similar positions don’t have children, so it wasn’t a frequent issue. Occasionally, though, someone would start whining about how they wanted to have their next kid in June but it took a month longer than expected so they’d have to settle for a July baby, and I would want to stab her.

The one person who I did talk to was older - mid to late 40s, and she was having problems with her marriage, so we would get lunch sometimes and sit together and feel sad. My coworker who I confided in was also European, and she is not as smiley and does not act as bubbly or happy as many Americans do. I kind of withdrew into myself for those 3 years and will never forget how awful it was - see, here I am commenting 10 years later on a message board about it!

One nice thing is that now I can almost sniff out people having similar trouble. So I will drop into conversation that I did IVF to have my kids. I let them pick it up or let it go. But I have been able to support those going through it now. Like telling them how I did the shots and how I worked in the logistics. It is weirdly gratifying. Because infertility is just awful.[/quote]

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