Reply to WWYD: Husband won't let me work part-time

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[quote=Anonymous]So this has been an on going issue but has really ramped up since Covid. I do the vast majority of chores around the house and do most of the organization and hand holding related to DL. This has always been the case even pre-Covid (I did most of the school stuff back then which wasn't as bad when it was in person). I also work full time.

I could easily go part time but my husband refuses to sign off on this! His reasoning is that if we both can't work part time and still pay the mortgage and bills, then neither of us should get to do it. He's the kind of guy who thinks SAHMs are only for rich people and that they live fabulous lives of leisure. So SAHM is out but I would like to go part time so I would have more balance in my life. As it is right now, I run myself ragged doing for everyone else and never for myself.

Every time we have this conversation, I bring up the fact that I do more around the house and with the kids. Sometimes I'll get him to concede on this point and he'll promise to do better but then he always ends up backsliding after a few weeks. He just doesn't keep all the details in his head like I do (you know the endless details I mean: when to sign the kids up for summer camp, when to schedule their dentist and doctor appointments, when to change their wardrobes, who to call for playdates and activities, etc. etc. If I left this stuff up to him, it just wouldn't get done and they would be shut out of summer camp and never have playdates). I do it because I have to though, because I know he doesn't, and someone has to do it.

So what would you do in this situation? Do you think it's fair that he refuses to agree that I go part time? Should I just do it anyway and let him get used to it? What would you say to him?[/quote]

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