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[quote=Anonymous]My dh is like you.   For me, it’s maddening because I feel like I’m trying to carve out some space about me.  When I tell him I have work to do, that’s me letting him know he’ll be on kid duty for part of the time today.  When he chimes in that he needs to do work too, it’s like he’s telling me my need to work doesn’t count, because he has to do some also.   It’s frustrating.

Same thing with the being tired.  If I had a crap night and feel like I’m going to be bumbling through my day, a perky “me too!” from my partner isn’t helpful.   It’s not empathy, it’s stealing my thunder and essentially diminishes my complaint.

I think the “me too” thing is fine with a friend, because then it really is just a conversation.   But with your partner, when you’re juggling parenting and household responsibilities together, it is annoying.  For me, I’m not saying how I feel just to chat, I’m letting my partner know something is off and I may need them to put in a little bit more today.   When they say “me too”, they’re taking that option off the table.  [/quote]

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