Reply to Crazy to invite friend to become nanny/tutor?

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[quote=Anonymous]Honestly, I think it could either be amazing or completely destroy your friendship. There's probably no way to know until you try it.

One problem I could immediately foresee is if you think she might expect to be able to take time off whenever she feels like it and expect you to take your own vacation to accommodate hers because you're friends and "should understand" why she'd want to do XYZ for this or that reason at a specific time. How intertwined would your personal and professional lives become, and how comfortable would you both feel about that? If you have to turn down a vacation request because of your own schedules, would she be ok with that?

If she thinks you have child-raising ideas she disagrees with, is she going to feel entitled to push back and possibly ignore your wishes?

And I'd be really clear about expected hours, pay, possibly build in whatever percentage you expect raises to be and when you would make them. Especially if she's going to live in you would both need to be really clear about on/off hours. And with a live-in you'd also be looking at roommate-style questions. What if she starts dating someone you don't like and wants to bring them into your home, even if she has her own separate apartment that could be tricky. What if she goes out late the night before she has to be on duty and you know it because you can tell what time she comes home? Would that trouble you?

Just some things to consider. I wouldn't dismiss it out of hand, and I consider our nanny to be a friend now although our relationship grew from a professional relationship so the other way round. But I do think there's a lot to consider, particularly if it's a friendship with a long history. And if you have mutual friends who might be affected if your friendship blew up over this, that's something else to consider - could have impacts beyond the immediate relationship.

Good luck whatever you decide, and congratulations on your pregnancy![/quote]

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