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[quote=Anonymous]What is so sad to me, after going through my parents decline and now my inlaws is how all consuming it is. It is highly emotional, it can be contentious...with them and siblings, for example, also  financially draining,  and if you are working, the job could be in jeopardy  because there are endless emergencies. It is full  time managing medical  care,  insurance, nurses, in home and out patient visits,  medications, the fear of doing something wrong,  the fear of not doing enough, lack if sleep,  etc.

And then they die.  Naturally there is a feeling of relief to some extent, and for some, even an inheritance...like a weird prize of some sort. Then there is the second guessing, maybe some guilt. You won't be bothered at 3 am anymore, or have to argue with your stupid brother or the actual sick parent who is being really difficult, but now wish you could go back and do something or everything differently.  
And it is  all because people get sick and die at some point in their lives...which is supposed to happen. It shouldn't be a mind f#($  to try and take care of a parent. Everyone deserves to be cared for and loved  when they need it, but I know what the reality is. Our lives are not designed for it now.  I know it will be the same way when it is my turn. I will be a burden- no matter what I try to do to preempt it. [/quote]

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