Reply to How did your spouse (or you) resolve long-term unemployment?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If he’s a full partner in parenting and not working, is he doing most of the doctor appointments, dentist, meal prep, childcare?  A stay at home spouse is better than a non-working ex, I’d think.[/quote]

OP here: I'm the default parent for all the doctors' appointments, any family travel, all bill paying, setting up and monitoring 529s, kids' clothing, school research/lottery/registration -- all that stuff. He's classic poor executive functioning -- may want to schedule a medical appointment for himself, but needs to be reminded or he needs help identifying a doctor, then either forgets to go or gets anxious and bails.

We're about 50-50 on meal prep and he probably covers about one or two extra hours a day of child care during the week (after school and before I get home, or if I have to go to work early). He does most of the school pick up and drop off (school is one block away). He usually does the dishes but the house is a mess when I get home.

I think the main difference is we were to divorce would be that I'd have to make dinner more.

I TOTALLY understand a few of the posters saying it's the same as supporting a stay at home mom. Most stay at home moms would be the default parent and be expected to manage the house, or at least oversee someone else doing it (housekeeper). That's not the case here.

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