Reply to Any insights for my depressed teen, Lesbian gender non conforming

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Please help her find resources for and by butch lesbians. If she can get to know adult butches in an age appropriate way through a community organization or even online, she may see that she’s “one of them” and find her tribe. I see so many teens who aren’t truly trans but think transitioning will solve their identity issues. Read about folks who have de-transitioned in the lesbian community. Read about gender-critical and radical feminism. [/quote]

I was with you until the end there. Gender critical, radical feminism is a way to tear down our trans brothers and sisters. This is a kid who needs support, not a fired up group of middle aged cranks yelling about who is on whose lawn.

I was that non-conforming kid. I didn’t transition nor would I want to, but the pressure in HS- where everything is so heavily policed gender-wise- was tough.  Eventually I grew up into a relatively gender conforming adult- folks might consider me a little tomboyish but that’s about it. I DO however, have a number of gender non-conforming stereotypical butch friends. It’s hard out there for masculine of center women and feminine of center men.  That said, I also have a number of trans folks in my life. Some transitioned when they were teens, others as adults.

My recommendation is to find a counselor who can guide your kid through high school’s rough waters. Maybe don’t put anything on or off the table- rather, consider a timeline of care so that decisions aren’t made in the heat of hard moments but with a lot of thought and consideration.

Best wishes for your child OP. I’ll be thinking of them. You might benefit from PFLAG- just to talk to other parents who are also going through similar situations. [/quote]

Well, the poster was right. It's not about tearing down trans but being realistic and not letting kids make major mistakes through confusion. That's what happens when you let boundaries blur. [/quote]

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