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Reply to "How to handle--better boundaries or do I just need to let go?"
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[quote=Anonymous]OP again. After hearing about the barbecue (which would be such a nice chance to hang out w extended family, who we see 1-2 times a year) DH was bothered and talked to FIL to clarify that we’re not invited bc of having kids. At the end of that convo he and FIL agreed that FIL visiting more often makes the most sense. I honestly think all kids involved are very normal. Mine are shy and that seems to bug GF—I guess she feels like they’re not warming up to her quickly enough at each visit? But there’s zero conflict between the cousins. I definitely think she does more “hosting” although even when DH or I say that we’ll cook a dinner or order a pizza for everyone the stress level seems the same. I also think that hosting all of us—9 people, 5 are kids—is crazy but FIL seems so sad when we say we’ll stay in a hotel. She’s also imposed restrictions about who sleeps where when we visit *and she’s not even there for the duration of our visit.*[/quote]
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