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Reply to "Can no longer tolerate my mother "
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[quote=Anonymous]It was hard for me, when my kid was in fifth grade, to accept that my mother wouldn't ever be doing any more actual mothering because of her own issues. It is very hard for me to set new expectations since they involve me stepping up and being the parent. I struggle with this every week (since I try and call). It has been nearly ten years since revealing her inability to support me emotionally at all while my husband had cancer. I'm almost done being angry, but I still struggle. OP - my advice to you is to decide who you want to be and what you want your kids to observe. Then do the behavior consistent with that. Stop fighting and just be the person you want to be in the relationship. That person can be "cool and distant", " giving and caring", "kind", "done"... you pick it. Just stop banging your head against the wall.[/quote]
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