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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What would you consider cheating?[/quote]

Significant Other (SO) reading porn? [b]NO[/b]
SO watching porn pretaped video [b]NO[/b]
SO watching porn online live [b]MAYBE. Have you talked about this? if so, this could be in the yesses[/b]
SO watching porn online and verbally interacting with the person being filmed [b]YES. Like going to a prostitute[/b]
SO doing what the person online video was asking him to do/watching what SO does [b]DEFINITELY[/b]

[/quote]

I agree with the above.

My now exDH watched porn.  When I found out by accident, I wasn't really concerned.  In retrospect, I should have been, but I'm sexually pretty open and we were having a lot of sex, so I assumed that the porn was just a small component of our life. It turned out his use was way heavier than I knew at the time and his behaviour had crossed the line to paying for sex and having sex with other women.

The things you describe are big red flags for me, particularly any interaction with live persons in any way. Some people become habituated to porn and become bigger and bigger users.  Some, like my ex, are actually using porn to self-medicate.

For me, personally, I would never date or marrry a guy using porn in these ways or, frankly, anyone using porn more than occassionally.  It really can mess with your mind and relationships.

I'm a little confused about where you say, "she even knows his real name and where he lives...". Are you saying her male fiance is interacting with other men in live sex?  Another big red flag, if he's been presenting to your sister as straight but is really bi or gay, especially if he hasn't revealed that before engagement.

Although honestly, the most concerning part is that her fiance is interacting with someone working in the sex industry who is careless enough about their privacy and cybersecurity that she could figure out a real name and address....[/quote]

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