Reply to Why do they say to wait a long time to start a new relationship after a divorce/separation?

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Reply to "Why do they say to wait a long time to start a new relationship after a divorce/separation?"

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[quote=Anonymous]For however long you've been married, the self you've known is who you are in the context of your marriage. If you jump into something new right away, that's the self you'll bring into that new relationship. You need to take time off to figure out who you are now on your own so that when you're out dating again, you can find someone who fits who *you* are, not who you were in your previous marriage. It's a really pervasive thing, from what your values/priorities are when you don't need to consider your ex's values/priorities to what kind of coffee you like to buy. You're more likely to end up happy if you first make your life into something that makes you happy and then you find a partner who fits that happiness than if you find a partner and then have to craft your happiness around them. Also, the more comfortable you get being alone and the more confident you become in your ability to be on your own, the less likely you are to stay in a bad relationship later in order to avoid being alone. A relationship will become something you choose to be a part of because of how it enhances your already good life, rather than something you cling to in order to avoid the unknown of being alone.

If happiness is your ultimate goal, give yourself this time.[/quote]

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