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[quote=Anonymous]You decide to be partners; you make a life plan. Why are there so many unhappy marriages, talk of AP and divorces? Is it your partner's fault? I think all of us have bought into the American Dream.  American culture expects every man to be handsome, tall, fit, big money maker, prestigious career, well dressed, well groomed, great husband, great father, great at fixing things, great at housework, great at yardwork.  Women are expected to be gorgeous, fit, bring in an equal income to her alpha spouse,  prestigious career, well dressed, well groomed, great wife who wants exciting, frequent sex at a moment's notice, great mother, great at all family and social relationships, great at housework, and never forgetting thank yous. Maybe the problem isn't "fat and lazy" partners, maybe it is unrealistic expectations.

When I read some of these posts on DCUM it actually makes me sad. Women complain men don't help with kids, chores, or don't make enough; men complain they are not getting enough sex or what their wives do is "busywork". No one wants to feel devalued or disrespected. Maybe your expectations need to be adjusted. Maybe we need to listen to our partners and not social media and other cultural influences. And stop with all the comparisons, judgements, and envy. Just appreciate each other more! 
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