Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I can provide some insight, also separated after 20 years with my ex. Aside from scheduling issues with 50/50 custody dating has been easier that I thought. Unfortunately online is the easiest way to meet people. I used Bumble until I found a FWB (all I was looking for) then deleted my account. I liked Bumble because I felt a lot more in control of my interactions than other options. It is exhausting but if you want to devote the time you could interact with several different men per day. You have to have thick skin and there are some weirdos out there.
I'm an average looking woman with a few pounds to lose and I've had no issues finding people to date.. I'm also comfortable in my own skin, Im a genuinely happy person and I love myself.
The main suggestion I have is to make sure you are healed from the dissolution of your marriage before you try to date. My ex started dating two seconds after we split so I thought I needed to compete and jumped into the dating world. Way too soon. It was a disaster on so many levels and I did meet a few guys who would be great if I had met them when I was ready.
Can you elaborate on why you weren't ready ?
I had to grieve the loss of my marriage. I had to come to terms with the fact it was over and accept that fact. It was a very difficult mutual decision to split but one my ex almost immediately moved on from which was a big blow to my self esteem. I had to get over the feeling of rejection and not being wanted. I also had to learn how to be alone. I needed to figure out who I was as an individual as opposed to half of a partnership. You do tend to lose yourself after so many years sharing your life with another person.
I dated someone casually for a few months who was a really great guy- kind, funny, genuine and attractive (no, for whoever is bound to ask, he didn't make over $150k). I felt nothing for him. I enjoyed his company, yes, but I just couldn't muster up one little bit of emotional attachment. It was almost like I was emotionally dead inside and literally not able to develop any feelings whatsoever. That's when I really knew I wasn't ready.