ADHD and Sneaky Behavior
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Anonymous
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Has anyone ever dealt with this? For us it it has been sneaking in the middle of the night to use computer or watch TV. Our DD is only 8 years old.
We do use password protection. Last night DD went downstairs shortly after I went to bed while the computer was still active. She was on it for 3.5 hours until I discovered her at 3 am. Obviously I have changed the setting so that it turns off after 5 seconds now. The content is innocent, minecraft videos. I worry this may be the beginning of a bigger problem as she approaches adolescence. I think is is extremely young to be having this problem, but maybe I am not alone? We have given consequences like no screen time and additional chores. Not sure what else to do other than to make it impossible for her to access the devices (which we pretty much have). But somehow she manages to find a way if we happen to get a little sloppy. We do plan to discuss this with the psychiatrist. She is on Intuniv, which is helping her with her hyperactivity, but obviously not with the sleep (even though we give it to her at nighttime). The sense I have is that this is an addiction We have always had pretty strict guidelines for screen time in our home, i.e. she doesn't sit in front of the TV for hours and hours. Maybe 1 hour on weekdays (sometimes none) and 2 hours on weekends. Is this a good plan, or does it make the need for the "drug" even more powerful? A little about DD. She is a very happy, outgoing kid who easily makes friends, but doesn't seem to get very close to them (not a lot of playdates, etc.). She is extremely empathetic, loves animals, just a delightful little girl. She is very talkative and has a hard time with boundaries--this seems to be her biggest social problem. TIA for any insight. |
Anonymous
| My now 20 to DS was always quiet and sneaky. No advice, but I just chalk I up to personality. Interesting. |
Dadomatic3000
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Sounds a lot like my DD. Medication is likely a must. Usually stimulants are a first line drug for ADHD, but if sleep is an issue, you can try melatonin, which is a natural hormone, safe and available over the counter. There are a lot of other options for sleep, but you should talk to your doctor about those.
My DD is also on a point system. She earns points by doing her homework and good behavior, which she can then spend on screen time and other goodies . If she sneaks screen time, she pays the points for the time plus a penalty for sneaking. And unfortunately, you can't afford to be sloppy. Consistency is important. If she can successfully sneak through once in a while, it reinforces the behavior. If sneaking is never successful, she will eventually stop trying. |
Anonymous
| No good suggestions but this is major problem with my 7 year old with ADHD. I'm the one that posted about needing a safe for the cookies. |
Anonymous
 I've got the chocolate in a safe.
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Anonymous
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It sounds more like an insomnia/anxiety problem then being sneaking. If meds are the cause, then maybe adjusting dosage etc. will be helpful.
Melatonin like PP suggested will help her get to sleep. If she's sensitive to environmental noise consider a white noise machine. Definitely room darkening curtains to help her fall asleep. I would think about limiting screen time in the evenings. Blue light can disrupt sleep cycles. Consider teacher her things like progressive relaxation techniques, meditation or something similar to help her learn to fall back asleep if she should wake during the night. |
Anonymous
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DS8 doesn't have a problem with sneaking, but he has NO perception of the passage of time and has problems sleeping. Things that have helped are putting an analog clock at the foot of his bed on the wall where he can watch it, an electronic metronome, and melatonin. He's apparently taught himself to delay getting out of bed by giving himself five minute intervals on the clock. It doesn't work all the time, especially since he knows DH works late .. so frequently he'll get up and go fall asleep on the couch in DH's office.
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Anonymous
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It's ADHD (impulsive) but it's also normal childhood behavior. I had a sweet tooth as a kid and would sneak treats. I also got into things that didn't belong to me. Around seven, I went through a short stint of stealing things out of my classmates bags and desks. I outgrew all of these behaviors.
What is not really normal behavior is being up in the middle of the night. My DS sneaks his iPad at nine- it's because we haven't been vigilant with putting it away. He also has a sixth sense for when cookies are in the pantry (but so do I  I think kids sneak less when the things they want aren't as available. Others say the opposite- make it available and the kids won't crave things as much. That may be true for kids without ADHD, but my experience is that ADHD doesn't work that way.
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Anonymous
| DD10 with add combined type is also very sneaky, addicted to screens, and has occasionally stayed up into the middle of the night. I have had to password protect and hide all devices. It freaks me out to be honest. Her therapist suggested that it was the stimulation from the screen time that put her brain into overdrive, allowing her to stay awake so late. |
Anonymous
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OP here. Thanks everyone for your insights. A little about why we are on Intuniv vs. stims. She used to have ticks, so we wanted to avoid stims which could worsen them. She has been on Intuniv for about 6 weeks and the ticks are finally gone. We have been playing with dosages, so that may be causing the sleep disturbances. Honestly before we started meds, she was a SOLID sleeper.
We still have the baby gate at the top of our stairs and she has a hard time opening it. Last night we closed the gate so that she would not be able to go downstairs without making a lot of noise. Not sure if she slept through or not, but she stayed in bed (because she had to). Maybe this will get her out of the cycle of resorting to screens if she awakens and can't get right back to sleep. She does have a hard time with impulse control, so this is probably more about that than anything else. But when it comes to losing that much sleep, it is alarming to me. Hoping it is more about breaking the cycle and that will be the end of it! |
Anonymous
Intuniv (actually Tenex, the generic) resulted in disturbed sleep in our DC. It's not an unknown side effect. Maybe something to bring up with her doctor ... |
Anonymous
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It has everything to do with personality, which is aggravated by poor impulse control. My severely ADHD 10 year old is very honest and rule-oriented, so we have never had a problem with this. I, on the other hand, have fond memories of sneaking downstairs at night to take my book from the bookshelf and reading it under the covers. I knew which creaky step to avoid on the stair! There were books I could not put down and had to keep reading all throughout the day (under the desk, while crossing the street). Nothing bad happened in my teenage years after that! |
Anonymous
Thanks for this. We actually were doing great for a while with this medication but because of it seeming to wear off toward the end of the day, we split the dose, and that is when we got into trouble with the sleep. She would fall asleep during the day too. So now we have her back on just the evening dose (as of two days ago) and hope that will get her back on track. It has made a world of difference with her behavior and with impulse control, but we still are not quite where we would like to be. Considering adding stims now that her ticks are under control. |
Anonymous
| Ask your doctor about clonidine. It's another nonstimulant for ADHD, but is more likely to help sleep than disrupt it. |
Anonymous
| My son, who never needed much sleep and who takes stimulant medication, does this all the time. I don't really view this as sneaky behavior. If he's not tired, I can pretty much see his point about why he can't lay in bed and just keep laying there for hours before he falls asleep. Melatonin doesn't help. So, I met him partway - on weekends or nights before a school day off, he can stay up until 1 am and be on electronics. On school nights, he has to go to bed by 10. |