"Chubby" baby?

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[Post New]07/12/2013 15:36
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Anonymous
I totally tell my baby I love to squeeze her chubby baby legs. And then I squeeze them! They are so adorable!

I think that for most people, chubby baby = cute, healthy baby, and they definitely mean it in a positive and affectionate way. I certainly don't take offense when people comment on her size.

My baby lost a lot of weight at the beginning and we had a hard start to nursing, so I'm pretty proud of those chunky thighs! (Of course, we also call her "the monster," "the beast," "stinkypants," and other nicknames relating to her production of drool, spit-up, and poop.)
[Post New]07/12/2013 15:40
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Anonymous
This is going to sound condescending -- when you are pregnant vs. when you have a baby, you don't realize the reality of it There are a lot of things you say you won't do or you will do. Reality will be very different.
[Post New]07/12/2013 15:55
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:We call our 18 mo "fatso" as a nickname. He was always in the smaller percentiles for weight and height, but had a chubby face and nursed constantly as a newborn.

It used to bother me but it's much less offensive and more of a term of endearment in DHs culture. Not sure how I'll feel about it when he's older. I also don't really like his family's focus on weight, but that's a different discussion as the kids get older and understand more.


OK, now this is not good. I was on board with calling babies chubby or chunky, but calling your toddler Fatso is just mean. What culture is your dh anyway?
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:01
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jindc
Member Offline
Anonymous wrote:This is going to sound condescending -- when you are pregnant vs. when you have a baby, you don't realize the reality of it There are a lot of things you say you won't do or you will do. Reality will be very different.


Of course, but calling a baby "chubby" isn't something I have been around. I don't comment on people's weight because I know I don't like it (thanks, mom!)....so it might be different. It might not be. There are things I say I won't do like "use my stroller as a shopping cart at the farmers market" which isn't really serious!

But really, how do you know when your child picks up on the "chubby" stuff? when s/he can talk? This isn't sarcasm - If I call my baby chubby, and he can eventually talk and repeat it and calls another kid chubby, is that ok?

I have put a lot of thought into the overall issue of body image in case we had a girl, but I never realized how much other people do it to a kid that isn't theirs and whatnot.
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:03
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Anonymous
Yeah, you're projecting. I'm very sensitive about commenting on people's appearance but I take such delight in my daughter's chubby thighs. It's not an insult. Please relax.
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:05
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jindc
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I'm relaxed. Just trying to understand it. Sorry!
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:07
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:As a breastfeeding mother I was really proud that my baby was chubby and healthy, it was as if I was doing a really good job or something (I know it's likely genetic and I don't really deserve credit, but I felt like I did). You are definitely projecting here. I wouldn't have any problems with someone else calling my baby chubby or chunky, either. I wouldn't confuse baby with toddler and child, all of the chubby babies I know have slimmed way down when they started walking/running unless their diets are very unhealthy.


+1. I'm proud of my baby's thighs and love to squeeze them. I also think you're projecting and it's not a big deal until they're older. On the other hand, I once got an email announcing the birth of a baby girl that called her skinny. Maybe because the mother is extraordinarily slim (and may have body issues if not an eating disorder), but it really stood out to me, and I still remember it 7 years later.
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:24
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Anonymous
jindc wrote:I'm relaxed. Just trying to understand it. Sorry!


Baby fat really is a sign of good health--babies need fat for brain development, to keep warm, and for energy as they become mobile. Calling a baby chubby comes out of the positive understanding of baby fat. Plus, I can't speak for everyone, but I really just delight in my baby's body--her cute little feet, her delicate ears, her beautiful eyes--and that includes her chubby wrists and thigh rolls. Most people I know don't refer to children past toddlerhood as chubby (at least not to their faces)--it really seems to be specific to babyhood.
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:28
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Anonymous
My DH still calls my son "chunky" sometimes as in "chunky monkey." My son is 8 yrs old. He was born small (just under 6 lbs) so when he finally did start eating and gaining weight, he finally started looking like a baby with fat rolls, etc. That's when he started calling him that. If it ever bothers my son, I'm sure he will tell my DH. I think you are overthinking it.
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:31
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Anonymous
There is a difference between calling someone a name to hurt them, and calling someone you care about a name as a term of endearment.

Even dogs understand this.
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:33
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jindc
Member Offline
thanks, PP....that wasn't really my question/concern. I actually think you can't assume how someone will take what you say.

but hey, if it's normal and everyone does it, that's really all I was seeking.
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:52
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Anonymous
OP, do you know any Latinos? Maybe a dose of their culture would do you some good. They routinely call each other day (gordo, gordito) and skinny (flaco, flacita (sp?)) as a term of endearment. I think everyone in the world should chill out about this sort of thing.
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:53
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP, do you know any Latinos? Maybe a dose of their culture would do you some good. They routinely call each other day (gordo, gordito) and skinny (flaco, flacita (sp?)) as a term of endearment. I think everyone in the world should chill out about this sort of thing.


day=fat
[Post New]07/12/2013 16:55
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Anonymous
Babies typically start thinning out by the time they're crawling and typically get longer and "skinnier" into the toddler years. So basically by the time they're walking/talking and understanding what you're saying -- those terms of endearment have decreased or stopped. So it's perfectly fine.

Another thing to think about -- would you be okay with somebody calling your baby a "beanpole"? I've had fat and skinny babies and it never bothered me at all when people commented on weight. My youngest boy (who's always been skinny) is my little beanpole (and yes, I call him that.) He's 18 months and tall and skinny. But of course he's a boy and I know you're referring to girls.

Which brings me to another issue -- why would it be any different for baby boys and baby girls? It' definitely seems like you're already projecting your weight issues on your girl -- and you really need to nip this in the bud.

I truly wish you the best. And keep in mind -- all this stuff may not even be an issue once she's born. She'll be yours and beautiful no matter what.
[Post New]07/12/2013 17:05
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jindc
Member Offline
It would bother me if someone called my baby a "beanpole" or "stick figure" It just so happened that the posts I had been seeing were all about a couple of "chubby babies". In general, I only noticed this because of some FB posts, and the fact that the only thing I know about my SIL's child is that he's "huge". The only identifier I have is that, which to me is a little odd. It also just so happens that an overwhelming majority of people I know with babies have girls.
I think girls are more pressured by society in terms of body image, which is why I had to do some thinking on the issue.

However, we are having a boy. There just aren't as many societal pressures out there. My husband was incredibly skinny growing up, so I do know there are issues with that as well. As a failure to thrive baby, he was always told how skinny he was and that his mom must not be feeding him enough. So I know it exists on both sides, since every story about his childhood from his mom involves that!
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