Fashion advice, please -- not "out" at work yet and need camouflage

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[Post New]03/27/2013 16:21
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Anonymous
You can keep belly bands hidden with long camisoles.

I agree to AVOID empire-waist things. I have a dress that ties above the waist that I wear when I want to look especially pregnant. If you keep tying/belting things at the waist it helps visually define the waist even if you don't have one anymore.

Rubber band through the buttonhole helps with pants at your stage.

Don't be like PP and wait til 24 weeks to go to maternity stuff. Maternity stuff is SO NICE after shoehorning yourself into too-small waistbands...
[Post New]03/27/2013 16:21
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jindc
Member Offline
I just got a black belly band, I don't think you have to cover up - just going for the "layered" look.

Also, maybe look for some wrap tops. They can be very "slimming" and bring your eye to the wrap area.

And when in doubt, v-necks....so people look up (or at your boobs!) and not at your middle.

Try shopping places you normally don't - Chicos, which is cut a little more generous (cuz it's for old ladies) sometimes has great stuff. And also, peplums are still in, which could be a helpful option. Fitted blazers will draw the eye to your waist, not tummy.

Congrats!!!
[Post New]03/27/2013 20:04
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Anonymous
I am in the same boat...not announcing at work but am at the point where my regular pants don't fit. I have found several longer blousy tops at Ann Taylor Loft (and the Loft Outlet) that cover my pants so I can do a belly band. I also just bought my first pair of maternity pants and they're amazing. I'm pretty sure no one at my office knows yet.
[Post New]03/27/2013 22:15
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Anonymous
Do you really think that your colleagues who see you stop wearing old clothes and suddenly have a new wardrobe haven't figured it out? Nobody gives a rat's behind.
[Post New]03/28/2013 05:48
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Anonymous
Nor does anyone give a rat's behind about unnecessarily rude comments like yours, troll.
[Post New]03/28/2013 07:00
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Anonymous
Good tip from Jin

I got a boxy but black blazer from chico's in a size 1. I think I will be able to button that blazer all pregnancy. it's horribly boxy but go take a look OP.
[Post New]03/28/2013 07:01
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Anonymous
oh, they give a rats ass, but won't ask. If they have had kids, they understand. If they haven't they understand office protocol.

My assistant figured it out while I was still hiding. Didn't mention a thing. He said things seemed familiar, like last time. Probably referring to my constant grazing.
[Post New]03/28/2013 08:06
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Anonymous
While 22:15 wasn't the most eloquent, it does ring very true. People just aren't as focused on you and what you're wearing as much as you think. You see them 5 days a week. Any changes in your body are subtle to them. Meanwhile you feel like aliens have taken over your body, and there's got to be a neon sign over your head screaming "pregnant lady here!"

So take the PP's about NOT wearing obvious maternity tops like empire waists. Other than that, the big scarves and the longer shirts should do fine. Just don't stress about it.

Good luck on the upcoming tests, and have a healthy pregnancy OP.
[Post New]03/28/2013 08:31
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Anonymous
Layers - long tanks under cute tops under cardigans. Also second the scarf idea. I'm there too. Congrats to all!
[Post New]03/28/2013 09:01
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jindc
Member Offline
I sort of disagree - it's very office specific. My office - all men but two, military, VERY misogynistic. Nothing is subtle here. They definitely care, definitely notice, and say inappropriate things. I think if you aren't ready to be "out" you do what you can to make yourself feel comfortable physically and mentally. I'm definitely not ready for them to know, so hopefully they just think I'm fatter!
If your office is a great, supportive environment, I'm sure it's different! So I understand where OP is coming from. If/when she's ready, she'll figure it out. Until then, hopefully the clothes recommended help!

I'm not even sure I'm going to tell my office at all. I figure just let them keep talking behind my back.
[Post New]03/28/2013 09:07
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Anonymous
jindc wrote:I sort of disagree - it's very office specific. My office - all men but two, military, VERY misogynistic. Nothing is subtle here. They definitely care, definitely notice, and say inappropriate things. I think if you aren't ready to be "out" you do what you can to make yourself feel comfortable physically and mentally. I'm definitely not ready for them to know, so hopefully they just think I'm fatter!
If your office is a great, supportive environment, I'm sure it's different! So I understand where OP is coming from. If/when she's ready, she'll figure it out. Until then, hopefully the clothes recommended help!

I'm not even sure I'm going to tell my office at all. I figure just let them keep talking behind my back.


Wow. What do they say? I am sort of waiting for this. My colleagues are wonderful but nosy -- very small office and most people have worked there many years and know each other well. I am the youngest and one of the newest. Some of the older women like to drop by and ask me, loudly and unsubtly, when I plan to have kids. Now that I actually am pregnant (but in the very early weeks), I am just waiting for one to suddenly notice that that time has arrived and proclaim it in a loud voice. They mean well ...
[Post New]03/28/2013 09:29
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Anonymous
Some maternity shirts can be your friend! I wore long, tailored ann taylor or even gap maternity shirts in horizontal stripe, untucked with suits. Yes, a tiny bit more casual than what I normally wear, but you do ahve to disguise it with something. You need "good enough" here, won't really achieve perfection.
[Post New]03/28/2013 09:39
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Not fashion advice but: If someone asks you if you're pregnant and you're not ready to tell, I think you should feel totally comfortable saying No! and looking shocked. I did this to one clueless person at work who asked me. When I announced it a few weeks later she said "But I just asked you and you said you weren't!" and I said "You're not supposed to ask that question!" It felt satisfying.


Love it. Great advice, PP
[Post New]03/28/2013 09:41
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jindc
Member Offline
Anonymous wrote:Wow. What do they say? I am sort of waiting for this. My colleagues are wonderful but nosy -- very small office and most people have worked there many years and know each other well. I am the youngest and one of the newest. Some of the older women like to drop by and ask me, loudly and unsubtly, when I plan to have kids. Now that I actually am pregnant (but in the very early weeks), I am just waiting for one to suddenly notice that that time has arrived and proclaim it in a loud voice. They mean well ...



well on the one end, there's the old lady who always says things like "when are you gonna be a mom?". Which was great when I was in the middle of an IVF cycle. Like you, I'm the youngest and newest in here (civilians, we get new military all the time but they're all male).

The guys do things like comment on women's looks. We had a pregnant coworker upstairs and one guys who was away for a while goes, "Wow, ____ got fat!" me: "she's not fat, she's like 7 1/2 months pregnant" "oh. Well, she's still really big". They generally say very sexist and inappropriate things. Even about their own wives (one guy is like, "I married a younger woman so she could give me a lot of kids" nevermind that the pregnancy they're in now is very difficult and closely monitored).

So it's all very uncomfortable. I complained to HR a few years ago, but nothing happened. Apparently I was just being a silly woman! lol. And yes, I'm looking for a new job but it's not easy when you're pregnant and have so much leave socked away for just this purpose.

Ok, sorry to hijack!
[Post New]03/28/2013 09:54
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Anonymous
Despite the rudeness of the pp's reply...people will know anyway! I thought I had done such a great job of camouflaging myself, and when I did announce everyone was like - "Yeah, we know." In the end, dress in whatever way makes you comfortable. The more in-tune people will figure it out and probably pretend not to notice, and the jerks will still be jerks!
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