Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Brigid Schulte here again. The evidence is this: Westbrook Elementary School in Montgomery County had planned a kindergarten field trip there - the kids were learning about money and the Playseum had designed activities for the kids to learn and use money in exchange for goods and services. Some parents went to the principal to complain, in part because of the DCUM postings, and the trip was cancelled, citing separation of church and state. The story was brought to my attention by a blogger who takes her kids there and is upset by what's going on.

I, obviously, disagree with the poster who criticized me - to me, it makes sense to get input from this very forum that is having real-world consequences.

That's a pretty attenuated connection. A hearsay report by a blogger concerning one trip by one class at one school allegedly cancelled because of parental concerns *partially* based on some reports regarding the religious aspects of the site ... I don't know: does that pass muster for reasonable investigation in journalistic circles these days?

Brigid Schulte again: church state concern affirmed by school officials. Not a tenuous connection. The hearsay is here. That's what I'm trying to explore. It IS investigation right now. This isn't the story for goodness sakes.

As a result of today's story of the boy thought to be missing in a silver balloon, who turned out to have been hiding in his attic - I've been asked to write a story on Friday about the gut-wrenching trauma of those first minutes when you discover your kid is missing, --and the emotions that pour forth when the kid turns out to have been hiding in plain sight. I remember a distinctly terrifying two or three minutes when I couldn't find my then-toddler in a public area - who was playing a game and hiding and hadn't told us. Anyone willing to share their stories? How do you deal with the aftermath, when you're flooded with relief, but know a lesson needs to be learned not to do something like that again? Call or email me Friday: schulteb@washpost.com, 202 509 3097.

I meant kids in tow! I'm assuming they're all in town!

Thank you everybody - this has been a fascinating discussion. On the question of how to define leisure - one poster was correct, the sociologists who do time studies tend to break it down this way:
Adult Education
Religion
Other Organizations
Cultural Events
Socializaing
Home Communication
Recreation/Sports/Outdoors
Hobbies
TV
Reading
Radio/Recording

The point I was trying to make - is that some of these activites often don't FEEL very leisurely - especially if you've got your kids in town or your mind is racing, thinking, worrying, planning something else. For example, when the sociologist reviewed my time diary, he marked the two hours I sat in a median strip waiting for a tow truck playing tic tac toe with my daughter as leisure. Now, no doubt my daughter and I made the best of a bad situation - but I would hardly call that leisure. Free, uncommitted time, yes. Leisure, the "pause that refreshes" no. So my point was, sometimes these studies and these categories don't capture the complexities of life, or how it feels as you live it.

For those moms who DO work and have leisure - I'd like to hear from you. Can you please email me at schulteb@washpost.com, or give me a shout 703 518 3029. Thanks!!

I think that's part of the problem - how to define leisure. In the classical sense, leisure meant doing something slowly, that you enjoyed, it was the "pause that refreshes" that left you feeling energized and renewed.

In the time diaries studies, many sociologists equate "free time" - what they call 'uncommitted time" - with leisure.

So if doing fun things with your kids feels like leisure, then yes, it's leisure. The same time studies have also found that once mothers entered the workforce, they traded personal leisure time for leisure time with their kids - and in that way are actually spending MORE quality time with their kids now, even mothers who work full time outside the home, than mothers did in the 1960s.

crickets?

Hey everybody. I'm working on a story for The Washington Post. Sociologists who do time diary studies say that everyone, including mothers who work both inside the home and outside the home for pay, have 30 hours of leisure time each week - an increase from the 1960s.

I've been keeping track of my own time in a time diary to see if I can find those elusive 30 hours, because it sure doesn't FEEL like I have it. What I want to know is - who does? Is there any mother out there, you, or someone you know or have heard of, who you can introduce me to so that I can learn how to do it, or do it better? Because I feel like my hair is on fire and I'm juggling knives, yelling at my kids, taking too long on stories and running yellow lights most days and not doing anything particularly well. Email me your stories of Moms who have or have figured out how to make time for leisure. Thanks! Brigid Schulte: schulteb@washpost.com

Thank you all so much. This has all been so reassuring. I'm going to start breathing again. Soon.

My son, who is 10 and in 5th grade, is having a serious case of the slumps - hating school, hating his aftercare program. He's been bugging me for awhile to just let him come home to have time to himself and I finally relented. We've agreed to try one day a week where he can walk to a guitar lesson, then walk home afterwards (we're in Del Ray and everything is within a block or two of our house.) He loved it. I feel so torn (working mother guilt? feeling like a failure because I can't organize my life and work enough to be home in the afternoon more? feeling like I'm neglecting him and awful that I don't know how to give him more choices?) My mom was a stay at home mom so that's all I know. It's just one more thing I feel like I'm doing doing very well. Anyone else struggle with this and have advice or solutions?

I love that! I was talking to child psychologists about these dolls - they said that kids at that age are fascinated by poo and pee and toilet training and they'll play with dolls that way, regardless of whether they come with the real (or should I say simulated) deal. I also found plush toys, a yellow drop of pee and a brown mound of poo selling for $38 ... the marketing literature says they just "reek of fun" ... !

Ha! Apparently the dolls have been around awhile, but are only recently being aggressively marketed. Seems that the popularity has something to do with a segment on Dr. Phil talking about how these kinds of dolls can help potty train your child in a day or something. (oh, my son took muuuuuuch longer than that, and I doubt a doll would have done anything to speed the process...)

Hey all, my kids were watching Disney Channel the other day and I happened to see an ad for a doll that pees, poops and comes with its own toilet. I remember having a doll that wet, Betsy Wetsy or something, but I don't EVER remember dolls that made #2 and came with a toilet. I was a little freaked and want to write about it. Are these things popular? What do other Moms think?