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No disrespect but I find it funny that you think I have an axe to grind because my kids can’t cut it with an "abusive coach". Suggesting we move down to a lower level? They are ECNL players. Not that this matters or means very much to be honest. We are on this pathway and it's scary as hell to see what is going on here.

There is a SERIOUS problem with youth sports in this country and specifically soccer coaches in this area. The reality is less than 0.5% make it pro - this isn’t and shouldn't be why kids play sports. Along the way coaches and teachers are the people we entrust that have the ability to either royally eff these kids up or impact them for the better.
Imagine if this stuff was happening in your child's school? Just imagine if your teachers acted like these coaches. You would be pulling them out and setting up a meeting with the principal before I finish this sentence. So why the double standard with sports?

Seems like I need to remind everyone on here that youth coaches, coach children…NOT mini pros…Children.

A bit louder for the people in the back… YOUTH COACHES, COACH CHILDREN! NOT MINI PROS…CHILDREN!!!


Too many coaches are in it for ALL the wrong reasons. Either money or ego…or even worse both. We need better coaches who truly care. We need a better system to vet coaches year to year and hold them accountable for the coaching they do. Most only want to align themselves with the kids who are talented…right now. Instant gratification. No long-term objective. No care for their full development on and off the field. No care for their mental health or shaping these players into strong individuals who are mentally and emotionally balanced.

We are building these children into adults and doing so can be a wonderful journey filled with growth and learning and pushing them to be the best versions of themselves and lessons of resilience. Life is hard and we do need to prepare kids for this but not the way it’s being done right now. You need to support them properly and intentionally through it all and never steal their ability to love the game and their desire to get better.

All I see in this area are coaches with HUGE EGOS because they won 1 dinky championship and they think that allows them to do whatever they want. They have no care about all players only a select few. No true quality control by clubs. It would just be so refreshing to see this landscape change. I started this thread for 1 reason, to see people's opinions on the best coaches in the area, and unfortunately at the end of this, it seems like that just doesn't exist.

Any person who says "this is just the way it is, get used to it" needs to take a long hard look in the mirror.
Pay to play is one thing but you can only pay to play so much. It's the politics and pull that come internally for the select few from the club (and I agree with you it's usually given to the kids who don't fully deserve it) - if you are lucky enough to influence a DOC because you are a coach at the club or you are a parent with a LOT of money, status and connections that can help the club then you will be able to find a work around. It's most important for these kids to focus on their own journey, but it's hard when they don't get the support they need from their coach. Unfortunately the regular parent who is trying their best to give their kid the best environment to learn and develop will get looked over time and time again. After seeing what every is saying there just doesn't seem to be a light at the end of the tunnel. Until standards are set higher and coaches are truly held accountability the cycle continues. Parents are scared, they don't know how to navigate finding a coach let alone a club that will truly value them as a member.
Favoritism is a form of abuse. Do coaches have favorites? Absolutely. It's natural. Should they make it obvious and make everyone else feel less than, absolutely not. Coaches aren't trained psychologists. They are regular people with little to no education on developmental needs of young people. They just claim they are soccer professionals which we know is also a low bar to be met in this country. It's not about tough love it's about how to treat people and ensure growth is happening and you can't paint every single person with the same brush. Coaches needs to be intentional with their words and actions and at the very least communicate effectively. We need to start holding youth coaches accountable in this country and if you can't see that then you are part of the problem.
SDC wrote:
lojack74 wrote:
SDC wrote:
soccer_dc wrote:
SDC wrote:
soccer_dc wrote:
SDC wrote:
soccer_dc wrote:
SDC wrote:
NotMessi wrote:Did Rae Ann Taylor leave Loudoun? Don't see her on the website anymore.


She was fired.


What happened? Bad behavior? Going to another club and bringing players with her? Hard to imagine what else could be done to get fired mid season


Officially, it was "bad behavior". Unofficially, that meant whiny parents with kids on the bench who were unhappy.


She was fired because parents were whining about kids playing time? huh?


Unhappy parents caused this, yes.


How? Did the unhappy parents make up false accusations of the bad behavior or did it really occur?


You have to know Rae Ann Taylor to fully understand, but some people call it tough love/tough coaching. Some call it abuse. But all boiled down to their snowflake not being treated like a princess. It's not black and white, but when parents threaten legal action, the club reacted.


And this is how we end up with pro players thinking the abuse that's been happening to them since youth soccer, and still happening in the pros, is OK. I don't know about the coach you're talking about, but I have seen coaches absolutely berating players. That's not coaching. That's not tough love. And calling it abuse is not being a snowflake. It's is very black-and-white. Not a lot of grey area when it comes to abuse. My $0.02.



I agree with you 100% that abuse doesn't belong in youth sports. With this particular coach, however, it wasn't the case. Some parents didn't like how their kids weren't catered to and playing equal time because they paid just as much as everyone else. It's this entitled attitude that's growing here that pushes out tough coaches who demand a lot from the players but aren't abuse. There's a HUGE difference between good tough coaching and abuse.
lojack74 wrote:
SDC wrote:
soccer_dc wrote:
SDC wrote:
soccer_dc wrote:
SDC wrote:
soccer_dc wrote:
SDC wrote:
NotMessi wrote:Did Rae Ann Taylor leave Loudoun? Don't see her on the website anymore.


She was fired.


What happened? Bad behavior? Going to another club and bringing players with her? Hard to imagine what else could be done to get fired mid season


Officially, it was "bad behavior". Unofficially, that meant whiny parents with kids on the bench who were unhappy.


She was fired because parents were whining about kids playing time? huh?


Unhappy parents caused this, yes.


How? Did the unhappy parents make up false accusations of the bad behavior or did it really occur?


You have to know Rae Ann Taylor to fully understand, but some people call it tough love/tough coaching. Some call it abuse. But all boiled down to their snowflake not being treated like a princess. It's not black and white, but when parents threaten legal action, the club reacted.


And this is how we end up with pro players thinking the abuse that's been happening to them since youth soccer, and still happening in the pros, is OK. I don't know about the coach you're talking about, but I have seen coaches absolutely berating players. That's not coaching. That's not tough love. And calling it abuse is not being a snowflake. It's is very black-and-white. Not a lot of grey area when it comes to abuse. My $0.02.


I hate when parents don't understand what constitutes abuse. What is considered abuse by a coach?
Usually, this involves a coach telling an athlete or making him or her feel that he or she is worthless, despised, inadequate, or valued only as a result of his or her athletic performance.Youth Soccer has an endemic on their hand with this and what Loudoun did with Rae Ann Taylor was the right thing. More clubs should really do some quality control and follow suit. Now the real problem is that the club is hush hush about what really took place so anything on here is pure speculation. They have come to an agreement to part ways amicably without discussing it further so that she can go and get another job and continue her pattern of behavior. Nothing excuses abuse. Know your audience and who you are teaching. Being soft has nothing to do with it. I'd like to see all these parents get berated on the daily at work and see how it affects their day to day confidence and image of themselves. Good coaches are aware of what they say and how it impacts their players.
Pepe wrote:
soccerx3kidsss wrote:This thread and subject topic went on a bit of a tangent focusing on Div 1 and scholarship being the holy grail and which club has the best record for placing players in college…yawn. That doesn’t impress me. Why you ask? Because that has nothing to do with being a good coach. If you think it does then stop reading now.

Players NEVER stop developing. So any coach who isn't thinking about making their players 1% better every time they are with them should not be on the field. A coach's job is to help develop players into the best they can be. Technical, tactical, physical, mental, soccer IQ, etc...the list goes on. I have not yet laid my eyes on a coach who impresses me in this area and it's a shame to see what being a professional soccer coach has turned into. Seems like anyone can be a professional coach and there are no standards that need to be met anymore.  Who are the coaches that kids want to play for with a exceptional reputation! I need better odds than “love them or hate them”. I want better odds than 50/50 all the time. Everywhere I turn I find dud after dud "professional coach" who thinks showing up and doing the same session every week while sitting in a chair is enough. If a player has the support they need to develop + they are passionate about playing college and your top level coach works their contacts for you then that is just a bonus.
 
I want to keep the focus on the best coaches at the ECNL and GA level in this area. and what truly makes them the best in this area. 
Coaches can boast about their rolodex of contacts, but that doesn't make them a good coach. We have a problem with quality coaches in this country! It's a serious problem and In the US anyone can be a professional soccer coach. No questions asked. I am seeing worse and worse coaches on the sidelines every year. Clubs are evaluating them properly. They continue to keep their job no matter what they do or don't do. 

Hence the question…BEST COACHES…NOT THE BEST HEAD HUNTERS and YELLERS. Let's drop some names!!!

A quick Google search helped me find top qualities good coaches possess are:

Organized (Can create dynamic session plans and not perform the same session plan week to week) 
Good Communicator
Punctual
Committed 
Passionate
Trustworthy
Disciplined
Self aware 
Empathic
Motivational
Positive
Knowledge of the game (Technical and Tactical) 
Excels at player management
Caring and Patient
Spends extra time and makes themselves available to players
Knows how to create a positive team culture
Knows how to talk to their players and push them to get the most out of them during practices and games
Can share their experiences.
Has played the game at a high level or studied the game at a high level. 
Has a background in teaching or is constantly willing to learn and grow
Has strong relationships with past players
Is a Leader
Performs proper player evaluations


JFC. This is the most bullcrap I've seen on DCUM in a long time. Please never copy paste something you Googled. FFS... it IS about getting into college for a lot of folks here. If you DD or DS loves the game, super. A great coach at most ECNL/GA high levels need a coach who can win with the talent he has. Make adjustments. Be committed to the girls. "push them to get the most out of them". I vomited. I promise you, when 16 year olds are 1-9 and losing by 4 each game, they give an F about you 'pushing them'. Good lawd, you still have time to delete your post.


I’m sorry my Google search offended you. Are you ok? Please don’t vomit. Seems like there are some trigger words in there for you. Luckily Google came in handy again when I had to look up all the angry acronyms you used. You seem like the type of yeller…I mean "coach", I want my kids playing for. Can I get your name and number? Youth coaches aren’t hired or fired based on their record. If they were then most of these coaches wouldn’t have a job. Most of the coaches in the area barely go through a background check or get properly evaluated year to year. Most have tumultuous reputations. This is my point. Especially at the elite level what exactly are these coaches providing players to support and prepare them for long term success in the game at any level? These are young children and I am asking for insight on good coaches in the area at the elite level.
This thread and subject topic went on a bit of a tangent focusing on Div 1 and scholarship being the holy grail and which club has the best record for placing players in college…yawn. That doesn’t impress me. Why you ask? Because that has nothing to do with being a good coach. If you think it does then stop reading now.

Players NEVER stop developing. So any coach who isn't thinking about making their players 1% better every time they are with them should not be on the field. A coach's job is to help develop players into the best they can be. Technical, tactical, physical, mental, soccer IQ, etc...the list goes on. I have not yet laid my eyes on a coach who impresses me in this area and it's a shame to see what being a professional soccer coach has turned into. Seems like anyone can be a professional coach and there are no standards that need to be met anymore.  Who are the coaches that kids want to play for with a exceptional reputation! I need better odds than “love them or hate them”. I want better odds than 50/50 all the time. Everywhere I turn I find dud after dud "professional coach" who thinks showing up and doing the same session every week while sitting in a chair is enough. If a player has the support they need to develop + they are passionate about playing college and your top level coach works their contacts for you then that is just a bonus.
 
I want to keep the focus on the best coaches at the ECNL and GA level in this area. and what truly makes them the best in this area. 
Coaches can boast about their rolodex of contacts, but that doesn't make them a good coach. We have a problem with quality coaches in this country! It's a serious problem and In the US anyone can be a professional soccer coach. No questions asked. I am seeing worse and worse coaches on the sidelines every year. Clubs are evaluating them properly. They continue to keep their job no matter what they do or don't do. 

Hence the question…BEST COACHES…NOT THE BEST HEAD HUNTERS and YELLERS. Let's drop some names!!!

A quick Google search helped me find top qualities good coaches possess are:

Organized (Can create dynamic session plans and not perform the same session plan week to week) 
Good Communicator
Punctual
Committed 
Passionate
Trustworthy
Disciplined
Self aware 
Empathic
Motivational
Positive
Knowledge of the game (Technical and Tactical) 
Excels at player management
Caring and Patient
Spends extra time and makes themselves available to players
Knows how to create a positive team culture
Knows how to talk to their players and push them to get the most out of them during practices and games
Can share their experiences.
Has played the game at a high level or studied the game at a high level. 
Has a background in teaching or is constantly willing to learn and grow
Has strong relationships with past players
Is a Leader
Performs proper player evaluations
It seems like this is a really broad question. Just looking for the best most recommended coaches in the ECNL and GA who are currently coaching as this is what we need to choose from. I am in 100% agreement that there are better coaches out there that trump the ones in these roles right now. Just looking for insight as to what is out there.

If anyone is interested in chiming in, I would like to know your thoughts on the coaches for these clubs in these roles.

Norther VA clubs:

ECNL

VDA
Arlington
VA Union
Loudoun
Fairfax Brave

GA

TSJ FC
Metro ASA
This is really great info. Thank you. So would it be safe to say the club doesn't really matter here it's more about the coach? Basically anytime I hear anything about a coach it usually is always some love them and some hate them. There are some coaches who I hear such awful things about or rumors about abusive behavior that worries me. There are a lot of coaches who somehow still manage to keep their job even with a track record of inappropriate behavior. ALL I WANT IS A GOOD COACH! It seems a good coach is so hard to come by these days. I do agree it depends on the kid and the way they get along with the coach but as far as what constitutes a good coach I think the things we are looking for are:

1. Dedication - showing up on time and being prepared with a game plan. Players are held accountable and good leadership!
2. Communication - has great interpersonal skills to develop trust with parents and players
3. Knowledge of the game and age-appropriate development, truly helping every player on their team be the best version of themselves
4. Passion and positive coaching style, someone who can really build a winning team not just steal players. Not someone who joysticks or constantly yells.
5. Connections to college?


Overall if anyone on here had to list their top 5 coaches in the area (ECNL coaches or GA) that fit these criteria that would be great to hear! VA or MD




soccer_dc wrote:Sorry to answer your question with questions but so many variables go into "best" coach. Knowing the ages of your kids would help certainly. But also what are you looking for in best? Best college exposure and connections? Best at motivating kids? Best fun team atmosphere? Best private lessons? What kind of track record - winning tournaments, placing players in D1 colleges, professional players? Keep in mind at most clubs you won't have the same coach for more than a couple of years so it might be a better question to ask about clubs instead of coaches. Even still, everyone's experience with a coach and club is different so it's really an individual decision based on your own kid.


I'm just curious about who has a solid reputation in the area. Seems like good coaches are hard to find and change very often. I have 3 kids 8, 11, 16. Like give me some recommendations of who you would have your kid play for. Competitive travel soccer.
It's just as bad if not worse at the youth level. Clubs need to do something. What are clubs doing about it? Has anyone heard of any clubs protocols to handle this? I see a lot of coaches abusing players and being allowed to continue coaching. Why?
Opinions on best coaches for my kids to play for? Who has the best reputation and track record in the area? Please provide Name, Club and Pros and Cons Thanks!
soccertrio wrote:
soccerx3kidsss wrote:Stay far away from Mclean (VA UNION now) ECNL program. So-so-sooooo disorganized. Poor management at every level. Toxic teams and club as a whole. They make promises they have no intention of keeping. The coaching staff is like a mafia. You can tell weird shady crap is happening behind the scenes. We left mid-way through the year it was so bad and it was the best decision we ever made. Our player started loving the sport again. They love to brag and take credit for players they poached from other clubs but never actually developed. They just try and manufacture teams and will cut your player as soon as something they think better comes along. They have a small handful of coaches that are coaching a million teams at once. They will do as good of a job as you'd expect them to do when working 12 jobs at once. It's just SO disorganized. It's just not the environment you need at any age. Soccer should be fun. Find a place that's fun, where they play and learn, and where your coach cares about you on a deeper level than just knowing your first name. They really love boasting about how amazing they think are though. Makes me laugh.


soccerx3kidsss wrote: OR someone who spent several years with the club and had enough. We lived through it. She is now committed to playing soccer in college. She's no Ronaldo but she's pretty darn good. I'm more of a Messi fan anyways. This is just a straight-up personal experience that almost wrecked another kid who loves the game.


LOL come on. Please don't speak about your kid like this, your kid doesn't deserve this. This is the U13 soccer, "committed to playing soccer in college"


My older DD is. She's 17. What is the problem with that? I'm not talking soccer scholarships for 12 year olds. I am telling you my experience over the years and where we are now.
soccer424 wrote:
soccerx3kidsss wrote:OR someone who spent several years with the club and had enough. We lived through it. She is now committed to playing soccer in college. She's no Ronaldo but she's pretty darn good. I'm more of a Messi fan anyways. This is just a straight-up personal experience that almost wrecked another kid who loves the game.


Looking for the positive, where did your DD move and what's the insider perspective on the new club that might be helpful to other kids considering options? Were there any clubs under close consideration that might be helpful for others considering a move?


We moved to Bethesda. New Club is much more organized, and we can see they have a development plan and that they care. More than anything our DD feels good and is happy, and is motivated again. These clubs need to realize that it's about the players (ALL OF THEM no matter what level they are at).
OR someone who spent several years with the club and had enough. We lived through it. She is now committed to playing soccer in college. She's no Ronaldo but she's pretty darn good. I'm more of a Messi fan anyways. This is just a straight-up personal experience that almost wrecked another kid who loves the game.
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