Thank goodness you guys are confirming that all that random crap on the floor that ends up in his mouth is germ-free! I also totally let him eat paper when his dad isn't looking. I'll half-heartedly fish it out the first 5 times he goes to town on a paper towel for example but then I just sit back and say, what the hell, he's enjoying himself -- I'll intervene if he starts to gag.

I think I am decent at the patience thing but that is probably because I am lucky to have TONS of support. I'm totally lazy about things like tooth-brushing (we do it maybe 50% of the time), and I too have been guilty of using milk that has been out longer than it should instead of tossing it. I feel guilty whenever I take advantage of babysitting time to do something useless like surf the net.

The one thing that seems to be consistent across moms is that early morning is the highest-volume. We've all got different storage capacity, if you will -- from boob to boob even, which is why you may notice that one side consistently produces more than the other. People with lower storage capacity might need to nurse/pump more frequently to get to the same total volume versus those who can hold a ton and can therefore go longer in between. I found it somewhat frustrating to compare myself to others, as it made me feel that I was "behind" or something, but the key is to just adapt to what your particular situation is (and what your goals are). There are a ton of tricks for increasing output if it's concerning you, from supplements to extending pumping sessions beyond 10-15 minutes to get to the second "let-down" to probably bunches of others that people can share.

I'm just a mom, so this is in no way in lieu of anything your pediatrician tells you when he or she calls you back, but we're going through the fever virus right now so I'll offer what I've been told. The lethargy and sleeping is usually normal (mine has been napping a TON today even though his fever is now pretty much under control), but you ought to be mindful of possible dehydration because that will make a child sleepy too. Are you getting enough wet diapers? You might ask the doc if you should be giving any pedialyte. If the fever starts becoming resistant to tylenol and/or cracks 104 (ours did on Thursday) then I'd take him to the ER at that point for sure.

The big difference for OP, and probably why her physician is being conservative, is that clomid has worked for her in the past. Of course that doesn't mean it will work 3 years later, but it's a slightly different set of facts. Have any of your cycles been monitored, to see if your follicles are responding? Have you gone through that "morning after" test to see whether sperm are surviving? (Clomid can sometimes make for an unhospitable environment for spern for some reason). Be frank with your physician that you would like to get more aggressive, have him or her explain possible next protocols, and also do scour your insurance policy to make sure you understand the rules of what will be covered when. Sometimes insurance companies won't cover more aggressive procedures until lesser ones have been tried for a certain number of cycles. I think we needed to do 3 IUIs before we were covered for IVF, for example.

I don't know if I'd take it myself. But, having watched my one year old get catheterized last night, I would have given it to him in a heartbeat. He can't possibly process that experience in any useful way at his age. I know they say most kids don't keep memories from birth to about age 3, but I think even somewhat older than that, children probably have a hard time contextualizing a bad experience.

Anonymous wrote:
This is a crucial time for parents making decisions about where their children are likely to spend the next 12 years and it is curious that this teacher has only appeared now that so many are on waitlists for these schools. I am not saying that the poster is not who he/she says she is but this is an anonymous board so we have to be extra cautious. I would be very suspicious of the poster on many levels and I would not use his/her view only to make my decision on whether to send my child/ren to one of these schools.

I'm appreciating his/her thoughtful and detailed posts. Much more informative than the generic "School X is too liberal" or "Everyone at School Y is a snob." Can we PLEASE not scare this person away with personal attacks and conspiracy theories?

Anonymous wrote:call me devil's advocate.... but say you met a stranger on the street and tried to start mundane conversation who acted like a rude bitch to you. would you empathize with them if they had just lost a child?

i would venture to guess that you would not. you would wonder why this person was so mean and rude when you were just trying to make conversation.

Honestly, I might immediately feel taken aback and wonder why, but then I'd assume something else might be going on and this person (a stranger to me) was having a bad day. I've trained myself to take that extra step, as it doesn't always come naturally, but it is a habit that can be developed.

I'm not sure how on-point your hypothetical is, though. The OP presumably is not being a "rude bitch" -- she's just having a hard time being all-smiles. Her post seemed almost philosophical, asking why society puts pressure on us to put forth a facade that might be fake or even inappropriate given whatever our individual circumstances might be. She wasn't asking for a free pass to be rude, just permission to maintain some privacy with respect to her emotions.

What's the safest way to do this? DH is looking at the Burley Bike Trailer. Anybody have experience with those?

It's actually not her baby.

Ours was 5 weeks early, and although we knew we were not in for a lengthy NICU stay there were so many things we hadn't yet done on our "to do" list. Family and friends got us adorable premie outfits, which of course few people ever plan to buy, and asked my mom what we had not got around to getting yet. We also had a few close family/friends actually set everything up at our house -- when we got home the place was spotless and the nursery was organized and there were diapers, wipes, etc at our own bedside as well. That was huge.

My other thought, if the mom was planning to breastfeed, she may be pumping instead or supplementing and that might not have been what she was planning on. If you guys are close, help her know that it is OKAY and find out if she needs things that would not have been on her list, like bottles, freezer bags for milk, etc.

I am kind of in love with my son's crazy baby hair right now and am avoiding getting it cut -- instead we are collecting pictures. His is spikey right at the crown, longish in back, and scraggly like an old man over his ears, but totally receding/bald at his temples. He does not notice and thinks the kid in the mirror is gorgeous. It sounds though like your little girl is actually not liking the hair in her eyes....maybe you could just trim that little bit back yourself for now if you're worried she'll hate getting a "real" haircut at this age?

I've changed insurance (to get the ped we want) and so have to change primary care docs. These two doctors are near my home and were in the Washingtonian list a couple years ago...but given the recent thread questioning the value of that list I thought I'd see if anyone had experiences good or bad with either doc before I made an appointment. TIA.

Further to the PP - how long do lifts last (w/o implants) last before needing to be redone?

I'm one of the PPs who says people can change. Here is some further background on my perspective. I am divorced, and remarried. A child with number 2, none with number 1. I stayed with my first husband (same deal, eternally unhappy, which he thought was what it meant to be "grown up" somehow) for years too long and I was utterly cowed by his anger. Looking back I would characterize it as at times emotionally abusive. We eventually underwent counseling together after I did some individual counseling and told him I could not have children with him unless our relationship changed dramatically. It was telling him that that made him agree to the counseling, so that may be something for you to consider seriously. Through therapy, he (after initially being belligerent or just smouldering in the corner through several sessions) he began to really see his role in our failed relationship. I saw my own role too -- I was so focused on his unhappiness and my fear of his anger that I could not stand up for my own needs. We were too far gone to put things back together, but yes both of us changed. You are only a year into marriage and may have a good shot at making things work if you start the process now and don't bury your head in the sand like I did.

Husband number 2 is at times a real crankypants (there are clearly some patterns about what personalities I'm drawn to) but his level of self-awareness is tremendous compared to husband number 1. He also cares about my feelings and can get out of his own issues long enough to hear me when there is a problem. I've learned I can't control my partner's happiness, that sometimes letting him vent is the best thing and to not take it personally, but also to speak up when I need things to be different. I knew I could parent a child with this one.

I could easily post here about husband number 2 on a bad week and have a slew of people tell me to leave the bastard, but I've actually got a very good marriage. And, I know the difference, having been in a bad one. Forums are not the place to make life-altering decisions. All my advice is qualified by the fact that I haven't got any real clue what your relationship looks like day in and day out based on one post. But do know that my hesitation to jump on the "run and run fast" bandwagon is not based on the idea that marriage is sacred and no one should ever get divorced. I wish I'd divorced number 1 much sooner. But it is a BIG DEAL and not to be done lightly or badly. Had I divorced without the counseling I'd probably just be making the same mistakes over again.

Hope this has been helpful. I think one thing everyone seems to agree on -- don't get pregnant until you are in a better place.