DH keeps getting raises but no title change

[Anonymous]

DH is a "senior manager" at his small company. For two years he's been angling for a director role and sees people younger than him getting it.
He gets positive reviews each time. He gets raises each time. He makes what is on par for the industry. He really just needs a different title because without it, he can't then segue to a new job at the level of seniority he wants (and it affects recruiting. too).

He is frustrated. I asked him what his boss said, and I guess his boss says he should do x, y, z...then DH says he already does that, and they get nowhere. (I'm not on the call so I have no idea how it plays out but DH basically says he's told he'll become a director when he does stuff he already does.)

DH then pressed his boss for a concrete plan and a weekly check-in about the goals to get where he wants to be. Beyond that, what can he do? Why does this happen? The ONLY thing I can think of is that my DH presents as exceptionally laid back and doesn't telegraph "leadership" in the way some of his peers might. IDK -- ideas??

[Anonymous]

He'll have to change companies to get the title (and probably get a commensurate salary bump). At least he's getting raises, but it doesn't sound like the boss values him moving up the food chain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He'll have to change companies to get the title (and probably get a commensurate salary bump). At least he's getting raises, but it doesn't sound like the boss values him moving up the food chain.

Yup, if he's not getting it, repeatedly, at his current company he needs to move to another one for a title change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He'll have to change companies to get the title (and probably get a commensurate salary bump). At least he's getting raises, but it doesn't sound like the boss values him moving up the food chain.

Yup, if he's not getting it, repeatedly, at his current company he needs to move to another one for a title change.

OK. Could you explain a rationale for repeatedly denying it (yet giving him large raises??). It seems like a company would rather save money....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He'll have to change companies to get the title (and probably get a commensurate salary bump). At least he's getting raises, but it doesn't sound like the boss values him moving up the food chain.

Yup, if he's not getting it, repeatedly, at his current company he needs to move to another one for a title change.

OK. Could you explain a rationale for repeatedly denying it (yet giving him large raises??). It seems like a company would rather save money....

Is he getting merit increases? That’s pretty common. They’re happy enough with his work where he is. A merit increase is saying “Thanks for doing your job. Keep it up!” But they have repeatedly told him by not promoting him that for whatever reason, they don’t want him as a director. Time to start applying.

[Anonymous]

They're giving him merit increases because he's doing a good enough job and there's no reason to get rid of him, but leadership at his current company does not see him as Director material. Time to look for another job.

[Anonymous]

14:07 and 14:10 are spot on!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He'll have to change companies to get the title (and probably get a commensurate salary bump). At least he's getting raises, but it doesn't sound like the boss values him moving up the food chain.

Yup, if he's not getting it, repeatedly, at his current company he needs to move to another one for a title change.

OK. Could you explain a rationale for repeatedly denying it (yet giving him large raises??). It seems like a company would rather save money....

Is he getting merit increases? That’s pretty common. They’re happy enough with his work where he is. A merit increase is saying “Thanks for doing your job. Keep it up!” But they have repeatedly told him by not promoting him that for whatever reason, they don’t want him as a director. Time to start applying.

+1. Pretty sure this is it, especially since you say your DH is at a small company. I have a couple staff who have been agitating lately for promotions because they feel like they "deserve them" and "it's time." Well, sorry, I value the work they do, but I am not going to create a bunch of new higher-level positions the company doesn't actually need just because they feel they're now personally ready to become a director or whatever. I have in fact told them this directly and they simply don't listen because it's not what they want to hear, and I wouldn't be surprised if your DH is the same (or just doesn't want to tell you he's not getting anywhere, maybe). Also, the fact that they keep beating this dead horse makes me much less likely to think they're ready for a more senior position that requires good judgement and social awareness. So when a position does open up, they're probably not going to be the first people I look to. But, they're fine where they are, and I'll acknowledge that with reasonable merit raises as long as they keep doing a good job in their current roles.

So yes, your DH should move to another company to get the new title. And meantime, stop harassing his boss about this or he's likely to stop getting raises and possibly just end up getting let go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He'll have to change companies to get the title (and probably get a commensurate salary bump). At least he's getting raises, but it doesn't sound like the boss values him moving up the food chain.

Yup, if he's not getting it, repeatedly, at his current company he needs to move to another one for a title change.

OK. Could you explain a rationale for repeatedly denying it (yet giving him large raises??). It seems like a company would rather save money....

Is he getting merit increases? That’s pretty common. They’re happy enough with his work where he is. A merit increase is saying “Thanks for doing your job. Keep it up!” But they have repeatedly told him by not promoting him that for whatever reason, they don’t want him as a director. Time to start applying.

+1. Pretty sure this is it, especially since you say your DH is at a small company. I have a couple staff who have been agitating lately for promotions because they feel like they "deserve them" and "it's time." Well, sorry, I value the work they do, but I am not going to create a bunch of new higher-level positions the company doesn't actually need just because they feel they're now personally ready to become a director or whatever. I have in fact told them this directly and they simply don't listen because it's not what they want to hear, and I wouldn't be surprised if your DH is the same (or just doesn't want to tell you he's not getting anywhere, maybe). Also, the fact that they keep beating this dead horse makes me much less likely to think they're ready for a more senior position that requires good judgement and social awareness. So when a position does open up, they're probably not going to be the first people I look to. But, they're fine where they are, and I'll acknowledge that with reasonable merit raises as long as they keep doing a good job in their current roles.

So yes, your DH should move to another company to get the new title. And meantime, stop harassing his boss about this or he's likely to stop getting raises and possibly just end up getting let go.

My DH is definitely socially aware and he doesn't beat it constantly -- it comes up literally once per year. So he's not badgering anyone or harassing them, but he is advocating for himself overall.

[Anonymous]

OP here again, since he started six years ago his salary has increased by 50 percent so they're not little merit increases. :/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He'll have to change companies to get the title (and probably get a commensurate salary bump). At least he's getting raises, but it doesn't sound like the boss values him moving up the food chain.

Yup, if he's not getting it, repeatedly, at his current company he needs to move to another one for a title change.

OK. Could you explain a rationale for repeatedly denying it (yet giving him large raises??). It seems like a company would rather save money....

Getting raises is about doing a good job.
Getting promoted is about “personality fit”.

[Anonymous]

I could have written this post! My DH was in a similar situation and basically, finally, a friend at exec level told him: "You're not an asshole." My DH is very mellow and projects an air of non-urgency which is helpful when it comes to doing the work but doesn't convey a sense of leadership at his company (which involves a lot of very tough personalities). He ended up staying because the money was good and he enjoyed the work but he was not the "type" to run a tight ship. Maybe this is your case as well. I agree it is not about competence but personality fit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here again, since he started six years ago his salary has increased by 50 percent so they're not little merit increases. :/

And you're not hearing what everyone is saying. He needs to leave to get a title bump

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again, since he started six years ago his salary has increased by 50 percent so they're not little merit increases. :/

And you're not hearing what everyone is saying. He needs to leave to get a title bump

How does someone leave a job and get a new one at a higher level? Isn't that tough?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again, since he started six years ago his salary has increased by 50 percent so they're not little merit increases. :/

And you're not hearing what everyone is saying. He needs to leave to get a title bump

How does someone leave a job and get a new one at a higher level? Isn't that tough?

Every job I’ve left for was a title and comp bump.