How do I get better at finding and procuring childcare for my kid?
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Anonymous
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I'm so bad at it. Always have been. I've never been happy with any childcare arrangement we've ever had, and I feel like we've wound up with subpar daycares and sitters that we then have to change because I try and try to find a better situation and I just can't find anything better. It's partly a budget thing as we are not rich, but we could also spend more than we do at times, but I really struggle to find better quality options and when I do they are always full and I never get off waitlists even when I follow up. Covid has obviously made this worse but it feels like everyone I know figures this out and I am still always patching it together.
My kid is 3 now and supposed to be in PK (public PK so we'll see, but that's the plan) this year so that will hopefully take care of our day to day, with aftercare. But I want to get better at figuring out childcare for school holidays, sitters for date nights, and next summer. We do not have any family we can rely on for any of it so we need to line it all up ourselves. We have flexible-is jobs and can take days off or WFH with DC for an odd day here and there, but that's it. And if schools close this year, I want to know what I'm doing as I look for childcare because right now I feel like I have no idea what I'd do. So, experienced parents, do you have advice for me? Where do you find sitters? How do you handle needing childcare for just a few days here and there, or alternatively for just a few hours a week on an ongoing basis? When do you start looking for summer camps or other care in the summer and what are good resources? How do you find nanny shares for kids this age (do people do summer nanny shares for this age)? I feel really overwhelmed and Need to get on top of this situation. Tips and tricks, please! I feel like a dummy because everyone else seems to have this figured out but me. |
Anonymous
| We used an agency to find a nanny. We literally went up to three neighborhood girls around 12 and just asked if they babysit. We tried all three and liked two of them and have used those two girls for years. |
Anonymous
| Nanny here and you are not bad at procuring good childcare options for your child. Affordable quality childcare for preschool children in this country is scarce. I know not helpful in terms of your current situation but don't blame yourself. |
Anonymous
| PP plus dealing with Covid restrictions (that are totally understandable) throws a whole new kink into the working parent routine. All I can say is I feel you. |
Anonymous
| Op here. Thanks for the kind words, PPs. I feel like the last year we’ve wound up in a bind wrt childcare like 20 times and it’s just like, how do people do this?! I feel like everyone we know has a longtime nanny they love (and can afford) or a good quality daycare they’ve been going to for years and will take their kid in summer, or some family who can step in when they need them. Meanwhile my kid spent the last three weeks with a rotating roster of flaky college aged sitters and playing at home while I try to work. I know she needs more consistency and I feel awful about this but I don’t know what else to do. Calling around to camps and daycares has gotten me nowhere. |
Anonymous
| Sheetz is paying $18/hr., So up your pay. |
Anonymous
FWIW, we schedule the summer in terms of camp between January and March. There’s no scrambling last minute here. |
Anonymous
| McDonald’s near me pays $17/hour. Pay more. |
Anonymous
Agree. Why take a job changing dirty diapers and putting up with kids and parents and all the stress of being a nanny when you can make a decent salary that is low stress. |
Anonymous
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Well I think that procuring good childcare is my parenting superpower but we still run into issues several times a year.
We have: -one Grandparent nearby (but he can only handle one of our two kids at a time, not both at once) -wonderful full time nanny -two neighborhood back up sitters -morning preschool And last Friday, we couldn’t find anyone because : -nanny wanted the day off and we had given it -grandparent was sick -one DC had sniffles so couldn’t go to morning preschool -neighborhood back up sitters couldn’t come until evening It SUCKED. But for me, I’ve had great luck finding nannies. On paper our nannies do not seem impressive at all (no degree or education or experience with nannying or childcare). They’ve been wonderful. One was a 30something mom with 2 elementary aged kids who had stayed at home for 10 years. She’s been great. The other long term nanny we had was new to the US (had just immigrated, and yes LEGALLY) so had no US work experience and didn’t speak English. We’ve developed and cultivated them and built relationships over time. We try to be flexible and treat our nannies well. |
Anonymous
And if you drop a bag of fries you don't end up in jail for 5-10 years. This also reminds me of the twin + toddler mom who thought she could get away with $26/hr for twins + 2 weeks of paid vacation. https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/987621.page |
Anonymous
| Make friends. Join. Church |
Anonymous
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A few suggestions:
✅: Offer a fair + competitive hourly wage. Offer a bonus during the Christmas holiday. Make sure to pay OT when over 40+hrs worked. ✅: Offer good benefits. Include perhaps medical insurance, use of a Nanny car while on the job, access to whatever is in your kitchen, etc. Even allowing the Nanny to wash her clothes at your house is considered a nice benefit. ✅: Give your Nanny as much autonomy as possible. Do not micromanage no matter how tempting. ✅: Treat your Nanny with the utmost respect. Be honest with her, praise/thank her often & never make her feel like the “hired help.” |
Anonymous
Her singleton was in kindergarten, not a toddler. |
Anonymous
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OP here. To clarify a few things:
- We usually pay 20/hr. And my kid is preschool aged so this is just childcare, no diapers (occasional accidents but not often), no housework, no meal prep. I feel like this is a really good rate. We basically pay whatever people charge— I’ve never encountered anyone who charged more than maybe $22/hr for a non-newborn. We also usually offer to pay transportation costs or will even provide transportation. - At this point we don’t need full time care except in the summer, so unless we find a summer nanny (how do you do this) we’re more just looking for sitters or camp/drop-in care situations. This year we had 6 weeks of camp but I could not find anything for the last 3 weeks. A lot of camps don’t start until age 5 it seems. We can do the same camp again next year but then we’re in the same situation with needing around a month of care before school starts. - We have friends! They don’t babysit (most have their own kids). I have one friend with HS and college age kids and asked if his DDs or any of their friends would be interested. We have used them occasionally but their lives are so full and variable at this point and it’s not a consistent solution. Definitely not something we could rely on. They are all heading back to school this fall so I feel like that option is disappearing too. We might get lucky and find one who wants to do a 1 month gig for us next summer but it’s impossible to plan that far ahead for something like this. They have no idea what their summer will look like. |