Upset woman at dog park. AITA?

[Anonymous]

I had my 5 month old dog at the dog park, when a woman came in with a puppy the same age and size as mine. They started playing with each other, pretty normal puppy play - soft biting, gentle roughhousing, etc. Neither we’re getting too rough or overwhelming the other.

The puppy’s owner seemed a little upset and said to me “he’s a puppy”, to which I replied “mine is too, I’ll keep an eye on her”. Then the woman started yelling at my puppy “no biting! Stop it! Leave him alone!” and started grabbing at my dog. I could understand her being upset if my puppy was being too rough, but they were both super gentle and her puppy wasn’t trying to escape. So I grabbed my puppy and took her to the other side of the park.

But they’re both puppies, so….they kept going back towards each other. I kept pulling my dog away and the woman would yell after me “keep your dog away from him!” And because she was causing a scene, more dogs started coming over and getting overly excited, which upset her more. After they ran back towards each other a couple more times, she glared at me, picked up her dog, and left the park.

I could totally understand being upset if my dog was harassing hers, or if she was being too rough. But before our puppies had played, she had also been screaming at every dog that came up to them, and it seems a little unreasonable to take your dog to a dog park and expect every single dog to completely ignore you and leave you alone.

What do you say DCUM? AITA?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had my 5 month old dog at the dog park, when a woman came in with a puppy the same age and size as mine. They started playing with each other, pretty normal puppy play - soft biting, gentle roughhousing, etc. Neither we’re getting too rough or overwhelming the other.

The puppy’s owner seemed a little upset and said to me “he’s a puppy”, to which I replied “mine is too, I’ll keep an eye on her”. Then the woman started yelling at my puppy “no biting! Stop it! Leave him alone!” and started grabbing at my dog. I could understand her being upset if my puppy was being too rough, but they were both super gentle and her puppy wasn’t trying to escape. So I grabbed my puppy and took her to the other side of the park.

But they’re both puppies, so….they kept going back towards each other. I kept pulling my dog away and the woman would yell after me “keep your dog away from him!” And because she was causing a scene, more dogs started coming over and getting overly excited, which upset her more. After they ran back towards each other a couple more times, she glared at me, picked up her dog, and left the park.

I could totally understand being upset if my dog was harassing hers, or if she was being too rough. But before our puppies had played, she had also been screaming at every dog that came up to them, and it seems a little unreasonable to take your dog to a dog park and expect every single dog to completely ignore you and leave you alone.

What do you say DCUM? AITA?

Maybe you'll get lucky and helicopter puppy lady will never come back to the dog park.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think she understands the point of the dog park.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like she mistook her puppy for a toddler.

[Anonymous]

In all honesty, as a professional trainer, this is a good example of why I tell my clients to avoid the dog park. People don't understand how to read dog behavior, and different dogs have different play styles.

Likely everything was fine. But equally likely, the dogs were under some stress (being somewhere new, with new dogs) and therefore react quicker and behave differently. It just takes a single bad incident to create a lifetime of fear and reactivity.

Much better to have backyard playdates with one or two dogs you've met and know to be a similar play style to your own. Dogs are much happier to have recurring friends rather than a new mix every time.

But yes, if you plan to go to the dog park around here you have to accept that dogs are going to interact. In other parts of the country there are off leash parks that are acres of trails and woods and lakes where it is reasonable to expect your dog to avoid other dogs. In the DC metro, they are half acre plots with dirt and nothing to do other than rough house with other dogs.

Just don't bring toys. Then you are the A.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In all honesty, as a professional trainer, this is a good example of why I tell my clients to avoid the dog park. People don't understand how to read dog behavior, and different dogs have different play styles.

Likely everything was fine. But equally likely, the dogs were under some stress (being somewhere new, with new dogs) and therefore react quicker and behave differently. It just takes a single bad incident to create a lifetime of fear and reactivity.

Much better to have backyard playdates with one or two dogs you've met and know to be a similar play style to your own. Dogs are much happier to have recurring friends rather than a new mix every time.

But yes, if you plan to go to the dog park around here you have to accept that dogs are going to interact. In other parts of the country there are off leash parks that are acres of trails and woods and lakes where it is reasonable to expect your dog to avoid other dogs. In the DC metro, they are half acre plots with dirt and nothing to do other than rough house with other dogs.

Just don't bring toys. Then you are the A.

Yup, counterintuitively, dog parks can be really unsafe for dogs. It drives me nuts that MoCo is converting park space to dog parks.
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/06/smarter-living/the-dog-park-is-bad-actually.html#:~:text=One%20of%20the%20biggest%20dangers,choose%20to%20disregard%20those%20spaces.&text=From%20minor%20scuffles%20to%20serious,common%2C%20even%20from%20rough%20play.

[Anonymous]

Was your puppy much larger than hers?

Some dog owners cannot read dog behavior, which is the source of most dog issues.

Oh well. Not your fault, OP.

[Anonymous]

Definitely not you, OP. It sounds like she brought her dog to a dog park and then freaked out when other dogs went near it. Kind of defeats the purpose....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In all honesty, as a professional trainer, this is a good example of why I tell my clients to avoid the dog park. People don't understand how to read dog behavior, and different dogs have different play styles.

Likely everything was fine. But equally likely, the dogs were under some stress (being somewhere new, with new dogs) and therefore react quicker and behave differently. It just takes a single bad incident to create a lifetime of fear and reactivity.

Much better to have backyard playdates with one or two dogs you've met and know to be a similar play style to your own. Dogs are much happier to have recurring friends rather than a new mix every time.

But yes, if you plan to go to the dog park around here you have to accept that dogs are going to interact. In other parts of the country there are off leash parks that are acres of trails and woods and lakes where it is reasonable to expect your dog to avoid other dogs. In the DC metro, they are half acre plots with dirt and nothing to do other than rough house with other dogs.

Just don't bring toys. Then you are the A.

Yup, counterintuitively, dog parks can be really unsafe for dogs. It drives me nuts that MoCo is converting park space to dog parks.
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/06/smarter-living/the-dog-park-is-bad-actually.html#:~:text=One%20of%20the%20biggest%20dangers,choose%20to%20disregard%20those%20spaces.&text=From%20minor%20scuffles%20to%20serious,common%2C%20even%20from%20rough%20play.

Np It drives you nuts? Don't use them if you don't like them! Btw, I couldn't read the article due to the paywall.

[Anonymous]

You are not the A, but dog parks are full of people like that, and other people that bring poorly socialized dogs that start fights, and people that bring little dogs into the big dog side and then act like their dog is being attacked whenever a dog greets it, and and and.

[Anonymous]

Doesn't sound like that lady was cut out for dog ownership.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think she understands the point of the dog park.

Yeah. Maybe she lives in an apt and just wanted her dog to be able to run around and get some energy out but she didn't want her dog to play with others. Not on you.

[Anonymous]

Super op. Just super.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Super op. Just super.

Are you the neurotic lady she wrote about?

[Anonymous]

Dog park people are the weirdest. Only thing I don’t miss about my old dog is having to interact with those weirdos. You are NTA, OP.