why is DCUM so obsessed with social class/status?

[Anonymous]

So many threads on strivers, is this trashy/low class, how to fit in with the upper crust. And it transcends all topics....parenting, real estate (duh), schools, travel, food, clothes, careers. Is this food trashy? OMG I can't believe you take your family XYZ on vacation, it's so poor/trashy/middle class. The intense preoccupation with picking THE right school, neighborhood. The anxiety of having average kids (no AAP, average colleges, just ok in sports). Is DCUM just a microcosm of upper middle class people's intense anxiety over class and falling out of said class? Is it because DMV is a place of strivers and DCUM is a classist cesspool? Or if we dig deeper, are people just panicking that their kids will not have the same opportunities?

[Anonymous]

Welcome to Washington. Land of the superficial and home of the vain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So many threads on strivers, is this trashy/low class, how to fit in with the upper crust. And it transcends all topics....parenting, real estate (duh), schools, travel, food, clothes, careers. Is this food trashy? OMG I can't believe you take your family XYZ on vacation, it's so poor/trashy/middle class. The intense preoccupation with picking THE right school, neighborhood. The anxiety of having average kids (no AAP, average colleges, just ok in sports). Is DCUM just a microcosm of upper middle class people's intense anxiety over class and falling out of said class? Is it because DMV is a place of strivers and DCUM is a classist cesspool? Or if we dig deeper, are people just panicking that their kids will not have the same opportunities?

A little of this and a little of that. This area is filled with people right in that top 3-8% of US HHI that are treading water and working hard not to go under. And the reality is that a lot of the kids will have to work harder for fewer opportunities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many threads on strivers, is this trashy/low class, how to fit in with the upper crust. And it transcends all topics....parenting, real estate (duh), schools, travel, food, clothes, careers. Is this food trashy? OMG I can't believe you take your family XYZ on vacation, it's so poor/trashy/middle class. The intense preoccupation with picking THE right school, neighborhood. The anxiety of having average kids (no AAP, average colleges, just ok in sports). Is DCUM just a microcosm of upper middle class people's intense anxiety over class and falling out of said class? Is it because DMV is a place of strivers and DCUM is a classist cesspool? Or if we dig deeper, are people just panicking that their kids will not have the same opportunities?

A little of this and a little of that. This area is filled with people right in that top 3-8% of US HHI that are treading water and working hard not to go under. And the reality is that a lot of the kids will have to work harder for fewer opportunities.

How can you be on the top 3-8% of threading water? Living beyond your means?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many threads on strivers, is this trashy/low class, how to fit in with the upper crust. And it transcends all topics....parenting, real estate (duh), schools, travel, food, clothes, careers. Is this food trashy? OMG I can't believe you take your family XYZ on vacation, it's so poor/trashy/middle class. The intense preoccupation with picking THE right school, neighborhood. The anxiety of having average kids (no AAP, average colleges, just ok in sports). Is DCUM just a microcosm of upper middle class people's intense anxiety over class and falling out of said class? Is it because DMV is a place of strivers and DCUM is a classist cesspool? Or if we dig deeper, are people just panicking that their kids will not have the same opportunities?

A little of this and a little of that. This area is filled with people right in that top 3-8% of US HHI that are treading water and working hard not to go under. And the reality is that a lot of the kids will have to work harder for fewer opportunities.

How can you be on the top 3-8% of threading water? Living beyond your means?

Because if you are in the top 3-8% but deeply, deeply insecure, your choices are going to stretch you thin. The “right” zip code, schools, clothes, and travel are all VERY, VERY expensive. Where can you cut corners and get away with not seeming “poor?” How can you expose your children to the right influences so that they become insecure strivers instead of “poors?” It’s all terribly stressful.

The pandemic seems to have made things worse. I am nowhere near as addicted to DCUM as I was previously because it is so much more boring and people are as catty as ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Welcome to Washington. Land of the superficial and home of the vain.

This site also attracts a very specific set of the area. I have never had a conversation about any of this stuff with a person I knew in the real world. Admittedly I don't live in the toniest neighborhood, but it's not on my radar at all outside of threads here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Welcome to Washington. Land of the superficial and home of the vain.

You forgot entitled. That's generally the case for any metropolitan area, tbh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So many threads on strivers, is this trashy/low class, how to fit in with the upper crust. And it transcends all topics....parenting, real estate (duh), schools, travel, food, clothes, careers. Is this food trashy? OMG I can't believe you take your family XYZ on vacation, it's so poor/trashy/middle class. The intense preoccupation with picking THE right school, neighborhood. The anxiety of having average kids (no AAP, average colleges, just ok in sports). Is DCUM just a microcosm of upper middle class people's intense anxiety over class and falling out of said class? Is it because DMV is a place of strivers and DCUM is a classist cesspool? Or if we dig deeper, are people just panicking that their kids will not have the same opportunities?

All of the above.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many threads on strivers, is this trashy/low class, how to fit in with the upper crust. And it transcends all topics....parenting, real estate (duh), schools, travel, food, clothes, careers. Is this food trashy? OMG I can't believe you take your family XYZ on vacation, it's so poor/trashy/middle class. The intense preoccupation with picking THE right school, neighborhood. The anxiety of having average kids (no AAP, average colleges, just ok in sports). Is DCUM just a microcosm of upper middle class people's intense anxiety over class and falling out of said class? Is it because DMV is a place of strivers and DCUM is a classist cesspool? Or if we dig deeper, are people just panicking that their kids will not have the same opportunities?

A little of this and a little of that. This area is filled with people right in that top 3-8% of US HHI that are treading water and working hard not to go under. And the reality is that a lot of the kids will have to work harder for fewer opportunities.

If you are in the top 10% and treading water, it's best for everyone if you just drown.

[Anonymous]

I think those threads are repeatedly posted by the same poster or the same 2 or 3 posters.

It's so stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think those threads are repeatedly posted by the same poster or the same 2 or 3 posters.

It's so stupid.

+1

DCUM is an active forum but the anonymity makes it look like there are more posters than there really are, I believe. There are only a small number of regulars and it's only one poster or only a couple posters who start those sorts of threads.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think those threads are repeatedly posted by the same poster or the same 2 or 3 posters.

It's so stupid.

+1

DCUM is an active forum but the anonymity makes it look like there are more posters than there really are, I believe. There are only a small number of regulars and it's only one poster or only a couple posters who start those sorts of threads.

This. Only a handful in an attempt to stir sh*t. The threads are dull, and if people ignore them, they'll go away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many threads on strivers, is this trashy/low class, how to fit in with the upper crust. And it transcends all topics....parenting, real estate (duh), schools, travel, food, clothes, careers. Is this food trashy? OMG I can't believe you take your family XYZ on vacation, it's so poor/trashy/middle class. The intense preoccupation with picking THE right school, neighborhood. The anxiety of having average kids (no AAP, average colleges, just ok in sports). Is DCUM just a microcosm of upper middle class people's intense anxiety over class and falling out of said class? Is it because DMV is a place of strivers and DCUM is a classist cesspool? Or if we dig deeper, are people just panicking that their kids will not have the same opportunities?

A little of this and a little of that. This area is filled with people right in that top 3-8% of US HHI that are treading water and working hard not to go under. And the reality is that a lot of the kids will have to work harder for fewer opportunities.

How can you be on the top 3-8% of threading water? Living beyond your means?

Because if you are in the top 3-8% but deeply, deeply insecure, your choices are going to stretch you thin. The “right” zip code, schools, clothes, and travel are all VERY, VERY expensive. Where can you cut corners and get away with not seeming “poor?” How can you expose your children to the right influences so that they become insecure strivers instead of “poors?” It’s all terribly stressful.

The pandemic seems to have made things worse. I am nowhere near as addicted to DCUM as I was previously because it is so much more boring and people are as catty as ever.

Income stagnation against rising cost of living and inflation means that wages have effectively been falling for several decades for households in the US below the 92nd/93rd percentile. I forget the exact number off the top of my head. Wages are effectively flat for the top 3-8ish percentile and growing for those above it. There have been some interesting changes in conspicuous consumption as class markers over the last several years such as in educational spending for children (tutoring, summer camp, test prep, etc).

As much as you denigrate people who want to live in the "right" zip code, you're ignoring that this is largely an educational expense to ensure the kids don't fail and you're doing exactly the same thing, though maybe under a different spend category.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many threads on strivers, is this trashy/low class, how to fit in with the upper crust. And it transcends all topics....parenting, real estate (duh), schools, travel, food, clothes, careers. Is this food trashy? OMG I can't believe you take your family XYZ on vacation, it's so poor/trashy/middle class. The intense preoccupation with picking THE right school, neighborhood. The anxiety of having average kids (no AAP, average colleges, just ok in sports). Is DCUM just a microcosm of upper middle class people's intense anxiety over class and falling out of said class? Is it because DMV is a place of strivers and DCUM is a classist cesspool? Or if we dig deeper, are people just panicking that their kids will not have the same opportunities?

A little of this and a little of that. This area is filled with people right in that top 3-8% of US HHI that are treading water and working hard not to go under. And the reality is that a lot of the kids will have to work harder for fewer opportunities.

If you are in the top 10% and treading water, it's best for everyone if you just drown.

A long standing expectation in the US is that your quality of life increases along with your wages as you age and that you can expect your children to have as good as or better quality of life as you. The vast majority of Americans have seen the opposite as their income falls against cost of living and their children see fewer opportunities. The band that is staying the same (which I called "treading water) is in that top 3-8th percent. Those above that point are seeing increased income and buying power. Saying that income is flat against cost of living as they age isn't the same as saying they are living paycheck to paycheck which may be what you heard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think those threads are repeatedly posted by the same poster or the same 2 or 3 posters.

It's so stupid.

Yes, they are just like school in the summer. No class.