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K or not to K
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Anonymous
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My dc was wait listed for pk at several schools but was accepted at a progressive for k. She is a late July bday and everyone is saying to
give her another year. Progressive thinks she is ready for K and will not put her in pk. Do we give up the one acceptance with the hopes she gets in off of the waitlist for pk somewhere else? Not sure what to do. But I do know that I don't want to do k twice. |
Anonymous
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What was your feel of the school where she was accepted? Do you think they got a good feel for your child? Was it a good fit for your child / family? OR was it your just in case, back-up school?
Who is "everyone" that is saying to give her another year? Her current school? On a post a while ago I read something that I thought was very insightful regarding "red shirting". The parent wanted her summer birthday boy to start on schedule - there were a few boys on the block who would be the same grade - but after observing all the kids playing together, the parent realized that her son was always a 1/2 step behind the other boys on the block - in whatever they were doing. This was the signal for the parent to hold her son back. I am not sure if you have a similar environment where you can observe your daughter. |
Anonymous
| Is the question really "we aren't sure we like this school -- should we try again next year to see if she gets into one we're happier with?" If so, yes. Or is it "one school disagrees with everyone else, could they be right?" If so, yes. And also, the school that admitted here didn't necessarily disagree with the other schools. Apparently they were answering two different questions (admit for PreK vs. admit for K). |
Anonymous
| Do the K. You can always reevaluate the hold back if you think your child is at the bottom of the rung on the K ladder once she is there. (At which point, perhaps you do reapply for K at another school, and probably have a good shot at getting in, given your child has covered the K material already once). |
Anonymous
| Do you think your DC will really want to be in high school when she's about to turn 19? |
Anonymous
| Do you think you'd want to send your kid to college before she's turned 18? |
Anonymous
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Oops -- July Bday -- she'd be 18 before she goes to college.
And she'd never be 19 in HS. Not a voting issue either way. |
Anonymous
| My two best friends in college both had September birthdays (one guy, one woman), so they both started college just before their 18th birthday. They were both extremely well-adjusted, and are now attorneys with major big-city firms, with happy families. More generally, the idea that an 18 year old is not capable of being in college is silly, a result of our continual infantilization of teenagers. 16 year olds used to leave their dad's farms and start life on their own. 18 year old draftees won WWII. If you treat your 18 year old like a twelve year old, undoubtedly he or she will act like one, though. |
Anonymous
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Yes and I'm sure you could find plenty of examples of people who started college just before their 19th birthdays and are extremely well-adjusted and successful. It doesn't matter.
Also worth remembering re WWII -- at that time the draft went up to age 45 (registration was to age 65). Not that participation in war is a good measure of maturity... We're generally more willing and able to make cannon fodder of young men -- especially unmarried childless young men. |
Anonymous
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Agree with PP about observations of your daughter--what do you think would be best for her based upon your observations of her socially, intellectually, and physically?
We have a boy with a late June birthday, and we are going to keep him on schedule. He socializes well with older and younger children, but seems happiest and most engaged with kids who are his age and slightly older; academically he would be bored repeating preschool; and physically he seems to hold his own--he is very active. We applied selectively to schools that we thought we be a good fit for his personality and were accepted to all (we are not connected or super wealthy, either). None of the ADs we spoke with even mentioned red-shirting. |
Anonymous
| If you can pay the full tuition, many schools wouldn't mention holding a summer birthday boy back. |
Anonymous
How would they know this at an interview, before one has even submitted an application? |
Anonymous
She'll turn 19 five months after graduating. I wouldn't call that "about to" turn 19. I wouldn't want to send a 17yo off to college, myself. |
Anonymous
The OP said "late July birthday". That means she'll turn 19 two months after graduating. |
Anonymous
None of the schools I applied to would even schedule and interview until they had your completed application in hand. |