If you were a regular church-goer before the pandemic, how do you feel about returning to church?

[Anonymous]

We've been regular church-goers and active in our church community for 20 years. During the pandemic the church did youtube services, but I just couldn't get into them. Now in-person services are starting again and I have zero interest in attending. It's not that I've lost my faith in God or some higher being that is loving kindness, but I just don't see the connection between that faith and church services or activities. Does anyone else feel this way or have you ever felt this way? How did you journey forward?

[Anonymous]

I'm really torn. What I really, really missed is singing together, and the experience of the building itself—the space, the pre-service quiet, the air of an old stone building. My parish is just reopening at full capacity, masks encourage and required if one is going to sing. I could go...I could even go this morning...but I find myself balking at diving back into the full social experience of a main Sunday service with unknown numbers of people. What I would really like to do is go to a more contemplative sung service, perhaps in the cathedral when they resume their full round, and get back into being in sacred space, worship while processing everything about church and reentry slowly. I have gotten a lot out of online services from around the world over the last 15+ months, but my living room doesn't feel like sacred space, especially after I've been sitting in it almost full time for more than a year.

[Anonymous]

We were regulars at our church too and it was a huge part of our young son's life. Our friends and his friends are all members and we were almost guaranteed to see at least one or two families to play with every week, so it was social, as well as religious for us. Early in the pandemic, our church held virtual services and we watched for a few weeks, but then the novelty wore off. A few months ago, they started holding in person services again and we've gone a few times. The choreography of the service is different since everyone is masked and distanced and it really changes how I feel about the service. The room used to be full and now it's mostly empty, which just doesn't feel the same. Plus, most of our friends with kids aren't comfortable coming back yet, so the social component is still not there. I'd love to say that we fill our Sunday mornings with God-centered activities, but we don't really and it makes me sad that our son is losing that connection.

[Anonymous]

I’m dreading it a bit (headed out in a couple hours) but I figure once I get started again I’ll remember what I valued about it.

I remember one of the best sermons I ever heard, and it was probably 25 years ago, about how some parishioners would come to the pastor and complain they weren’t getting as much out of sermons and church attendance as they wanted, and the pastor’s answer to that was basically, so put more in, because you’re only going to get out what you put in.

[Anonymous]

I've returned to church after I was vaccinated. I'm happy to be back. It feels like life has returned to normal.

Aside from that, my view is that church is important to attend and uphold because if there were no churches, where would people go who would like to learn more about a particular faith? The internet? Reading on their own? Maybe, but community is important to me, even though I'm not a particularly social person. I'm glad I was able to go to an actual building with people on my faith journey, so I want to do that for others too.

[Anonymous]

We got turned off by the politics from the pulpit and repulsed by how meanspirited many churchgoers (I won't call them Christians) have become. The pandemic was a good out for us. We aren't going back to chuech and neither is our money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We got turned off by the politics from the pulpit and repulsed by how meanspirited many churchgoers (I won't call them Christians) have become. The pandemic was a good out for us. We aren't going back to chuech and neither is our money.

That’s a weird conclusion. Why not just find a new church? We’re Presbyterians and I can’t say I’ve seen any sort of issue with politics or mean spiritedness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We got turned off by the politics from the pulpit and repulsed by how meanspirited many churchgoers (I won't call them Christians) have become. The pandemic was a good out for us. We aren't going back to chuech and neither is our money.

By your phrasing, I don't believe you are a regular church goer. You know every church is not like this. Why not go to a different one? It sounds like you just don't want to go in the first place and are making excuses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We got turned off by the politics from the pulpit and repulsed by how meanspirited many churchgoers (I won't call them Christians) have become. The pandemic was a good out for us. We aren't going back to chuech and neither is our money.

By your phrasing, I don't believe you are a regular church goer. You know every church is not like this. Why not go to a different one? It sounds like you just don't want to go in the first place and are making excuses.

Or is just a run of the mill troll trying to create the impression of some backlash...

[Anonymous]

While I go through ups and downs with my level of faith / belief, the people in my church community keep me grounded. I'm happy to be back but we are still open only at partial capacity with no singing and only "spiritual" communion -- no bread and wine. For many people there are not yet enough upsides to return in person yet, and that's ok. We didn't get here overnight, it's going to take time to rebuild.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:While I go through ups and downs with my level of faith / belief, the people in my church community keep me grounded. I'm happy to be back but we are still open only at partial capacity with no singing and only "spiritual" communion -- no bread and wine. For many people there are not yet enough upsides to return in person yet, and that's ok. We didn't get here overnight, it's going to take time to rebuild.

I suspect this is a prevailing attitude among many pre-pandemic church-goers. I also predict that some, but not all, will return to services

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We've been regular church-goers and active in our church community for 20 years. During the pandemic the church did youtube services, but I just couldn't get into them. Now in-person services are starting again and I have zero interest in attending. It's not that I've lost my faith in God or some higher being that is loving kindness, but I just don't see the connection between that faith and church services or activities. Does anyone else feel this way or have you ever felt this way? How did you journey forward?

I’ve always distinguished between faith and practice. And services are only part of practice. I don’t think skipping it means anyone is less faithful. But I do miss that part. I am eager to return because I think that there’s value in the community and can’t yet due to a health issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We got turned off by the politics from the pulpit and repulsed by how meanspirited many churchgoers (I won't call them Christians) have become. The pandemic was a good out for us. We aren't going back to chuech and neither is our money.

By your phrasing, I don't believe you are a regular church goer. You know every church is not like this. Why not go to a different one? It sounds like you just don't want to go in the first place and are making excuses.

I'm not a regular church goer anymore. The pandemic break and events of the past year have given me a new perspective on religion in general.

[Anonymous]

Not ready yet to return. Still processing the the 100's of unmarked graves of children killed, and knowing their are 100's more to be discovered.

[Anonymous]

OP here -- Thanks for your willingness to engage in this discussion. My reluctance to return to church services isn't COVID-related, either in the sense of fears of a renewed pandemic or anxiety about interacting with large groups of people indoors. In the past couple of months I've traveled by plane, attended two large events with indoor components, participated in smaller meetings indoors, etc. (I've been vaccinated as have been all my family members.) So, I don't anticipate any discomfort about attending church; I just don't feel that large services with their rituals and sermons will hold the same meaning for me as they once did. When the pandemic began, I thought I'd miss those long-comforting rituals, but that hasn't been so. Instead, I've found that prayer, stillness, and meditation have fed my soul. As an earlier poster mentioned, a smaller contemplative service might be what I'm looking for now, but, the performance aspects of church (processional, music, sermon) are not compelling to me at this time. For a couple of months now I've been doing an outdoors house church service with friends, which has been lovely and centering. I'm hoping to continue with that.