Withholding poop during potty training - any advice

[Anonymous]

My DS (a little over 2.5) is on week 3 of potty training (Oh crap method). We have pees down pretty well, but he has been withholding poop to the point of pain (he will cry out that his stomach hurts, run to the potty, but then clench up and not push it out, no matter how much we sit and reassure him that it will be okay, etc.). Per my pediatrician, I gave him a glycerin suppository 2x this past week, which did the trick. Of course I know I can't use those long term. Any suggestions? part of the problem is his diet - he's a super picky eater and does not eat any vegetables (besides the ones in his pouches). I've been making him smoothies every day and he drinks those, but it's not enough when he literally holds the poop in his body with all his might!

[Anonymous]

It sounds like he’s not ready.

[Anonymous]

Did you read the oh crap chapter about troubleshooting poop issues?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you read the oh crap chapter about troubleshooting poop issues?

Yes, I reread it yesterday. Nothing helpful for us in there, unfortunately.

[Anonymous]

I know this isn’t ideal, but can you just back off and let him poop in his diaper a bit longer? My daughter potty trained for pee just after she turned 2, but we kept a diaper for naps and night and she would poop in her nap diaper. It was annoying, but when she was 3 and a few months, I took away her naptime diaper and she started pooping in the potty. At that point, it was pretty easy.

[Anonymous]

DS was 22 months but used to withhold poop in his diaper too so potty training was no different. We gave him white grape juice and when I saw him clenching, I pulled his knees up and sort or held him over the potty. He couldn’t withhold it in this squaring position and he pooped. Cheers, praise, big rewards! That was it. Since he’s been potty trained, he never withholds it suffers constipation. Sitting straightens the defending colon.

Do not go back to diapers. If he can withhold a bowel movement, he’s definitely physically ready.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know this isn’t ideal, but can you just back off and let him poop in his diaper a bit longer? My daughter potty trained for pee just after she turned 2, but we kept a diaper for naps and night and she would poop in her nap diaper. It was annoying, but when she was 3 and a few months, I took away her naptime diaper and she started pooping in the potty. At that point, it was pretty easy.

Didn’t her room stink? DS did this twice at the beginning of his nap and the stench when He woke up was awful. I never could have done that for a full year.

[Anonymous]

BIG rewards for poops in the potty. Like little hot wheel cars he can see but not play with yet. We lined them up in their clam shells on the bathroom 🚽 counter.

Be prepared to talk him through it. It can be scary at first. Absolutely keep him bottomless until he starts pooping in the potty - no diapers for naps or night and just deal with the wet bed until he’s pooping on the potty.

Poop phobia is real and it takes some kids years if you give into letting them poop in diapers.

[Anonymous]

Same challenge with our DD. LOTS of sitting with her on the pot, reading. Eventually it just happened when she was distracted. The look of horror on her face to see her business in the toilet was priceless, but after she got over that hurdle it was fine.

[Anonymous]

Bribe with M&Ms. It works like a charm. You can phase it out after 3 or 4 poops on the potty.

[Anonymous]

When my kids were toddlers, I started to sit them down on the portable potty as soon as they got up. I gave them a bottle or sippy cup of warm milk and sat next to them and read them a picture book. Within 10 minutes they would poop in the potty.

I was not doing this to potty train them so there was no pressure. Instead, it was teaching them good morning routine of being regular and emptying their bowels in the morning. Just like you teach them to brush the teeth twice a day. Thankfully, this healthy habit was formed very early for them and they also got toilet trained very early.

I did not do this with any conscious thought frankly. This was basically how people in my culture were raised ( in another country) so I fell back to that. Kids are made to sit on potty by parents from a very early age so that they don't soil themselves with pee and poop. Some of it is due to wanting to make the kids feel comfortable (no diaper rash or UTI etc happens) and partly to not have to clean the reusable diapers or spend money on disposable diapers. Some people think that kids are not trained, rather parents are. They may be right in a way, but, one of the good results of this is that kids become pretty regular in their poop schedule and usually will void their bowels in the morning. Very helpful when they start going to preschool or even proper school. They don't have accidents, they don't have to go potty in school and they don't have to use public toilets.

When I started to toilet train such that the kid would use the potty without my prompting and help, I basically put a portable potty on each level of the house, the toy room and even the backyard, next to the swing set. I made sure that when the kid needed to go, the potty was close at hand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When my kids were toddlers, I started to sit them down on the portable potty as soon as they got up. I gave them a bottle or sippy cup of warm milk and sat next to them and read them a picture book. Within 10 minutes they would poop in the potty.

I was not doing this to potty train them so there was no pressure. Instead, it was teaching them good morning routine of being regular and emptying their bowels in the morning. Just like you teach them to brush the teeth twice a day. Thankfully, this healthy habit was formed very early for them and they also got toilet trained very early.

I did not do this with any conscious thought frankly. This was basically how people in my culture were raised ( in another country) so I fell back to that. Kids are made to sit on potty by parents from a very early age so that they don't soil themselves with pee and poop. Some of it is due to wanting to make the kids feel comfortable (no diaper rash or UTI etc happens) and partly to not have to clean the reusable diapers or spend money on disposable diapers. Some people think that kids are not trained, rather parents are. They may be right in a way, but, one of the good results of this is that kids become pretty regular in their poop schedule and usually will void their bowels in the morning. Very helpful when they start going to preschool or even proper school. They don't have accidents, they don't have to go potty in school and they don't have to use public toilets.

When I started to toilet train such that the kid would use the potty without my prompting and help, I basically put a portable potty on each level of the house, the toy room and even the backyard, next to the swing set. I made sure that when the kid needed to go, the potty was close at hand.

This is really interesting. How old did you start? DS potty trained young (22 months) and easily but is in a routine of pooping after lunch which will not be ideal for preschool in the fall. I don’t think I can change it now with DS but I’d like to try it when the baby is ready.