When did your teenage son show interest in girls?

[Anonymous]

I realize this question assumes your son is straight, if he’s not, share that too.

My son is 15 and just finished 9th grade. He has a group of male friends, but so far hasn’t really talked about girls or shown interest. I know it’s a Covid year too so we’re just getting back to him actually seeing and interacting with girls at school too.

My son and I are close but he wouldn’t want to share if he was interested in someone with me. Just wondering what others experienced with the rest of high school and how your teen started “dating” or hanging with a romantic partner these days.

[Anonymous]

I have 2 high-schoolers. Oldest son had a girlfriend in 9th-10th grade. Second son is finishing up 10th grade, and he has shown no interest in girls. They live in such a different world than we did - even pre-COVID. I'm really afraid this generation as a group will have fewer children and marriages / long-term partnerships than ours.

[Anonymous]

Leave him alone, don't say a word about it to him. How awkward! Don't put that pressure on him. It's been a weird few years where people couldn't be around each other. The last thing he needs is his mom asking why he hasn't coupled up yet. Let him go at his own pace. You don't need to push him into anything.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Did I say I was going to ask him about it? No. What do you take me for, a rookie? I’m not gonna do that to him.

That’s what I’m asking here with other parents who have older teens and what they’ve experienced.

[Anonymous]

Parent of 10th grade son (soon to be rising 11th grader) who has never shown a romantic interest in anyone of any gender. Also have an 8th grader daughter who seems to have had many crushes (or at least has lots of discussions about relationships with her friends).

[Anonymous]

8th grade

[Anonymous]

5th grade... lots of porn sites popping up on browser history

[Anonymous]

End of 9th grade (14) as far as I know.

[Anonymous]

My son is finishing 10th grade and told me he is interested in a guy he met on IG. I had no idea he was gay (he says he is bisexual). He hasn't shown an interest before this. He went to a coed school in MS and now is at an all-boys school. I remember my older brother being a bit clueless about girls until the second half of HS.

[Anonymous]

Mine not until 18, really. Had a girlfriend in 5th/6th grade, whatever that entails at that age. Then nothing really until 18. He's a very outgoing and popular athlete, both in high school and college, so it wasn't lack of opportunity. Just, according to him, didn't want the pressure. And was pretty focused on sports.

[Anonymous]

My 12 year old nephew (7th grade) tells me about girls he has a crush on or wants to hang out with and doesn't tell his mother (my SIL) anything. Mine are still little but I think in many cases you won't know about your own kids' romantic interests until long after it's started.

[Anonymous]

When a girl showed interest in him. He’s very shy and his first girlfriend sort of led the show at 14.

[Anonymous]

An interest? Back in 4th or 5th grade. That’s when he started talking about who liked who and which girl he liked at the moment. In 6th he had a girlfriend, which meant they occasionally texted “hi.” He stopped talking to us about girls by middle school but he was definitely texting them. He has not gone on a real or even a group date yet. I’m not sure if that will change when things start opening up with Covid. They may be meeting girls out locally in groups when they go out to eat and I don’t know about it.

[Anonymous]

In 4th grade he told me about a crush. So the interest has been there for a while, but he doesn’t say anything to us (is now in 9th grade).

[Anonymous]

Parents underestimate how good teens can be at hiding their interest. I’m female and I started being interested in boys in 5th grade and started hooking up in 10th. My parents never knew even though we were close and at my high school graduation I overheard my mom say to someone that I wasn’t interested in boys yet.