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if you are getting funeral plots for your parents where are they?
I have one parent who is declining quickly and another who is really not well. I always assumed they would want plots in the small city in the northeast where I grew up, and where a bunch of their friends have plots. They were part of a really tight immigrant community up there, and a bunch of families bought plots together. But it turns out my parents never pulled the trigger. And we have NO other family left in that area any more. Now they want to get plots here near DC--or, well, really, closer to Gaithersburg since there don't seem to be a lot of open cemeteries near the city. I really don't think of this as home for them, but the reality is that they will almost certainly pass here. Since my family is here, as is my only sibling's family, I guess it makes sense? Feels weird to me but I guess death is death and at some level the location doesn't really matter...it would be nice to have plots nearby where we could visit them and keep them up. Curious what others have done. |
| Cremation. Everyone’s doing it these days... |
| I’m only 53 but my 19 year old son has asked me several times where I want to be buried. As background, he’s on the spectrum and says what he thinks. Also, my dad died a couple of years ago and is buried where I grew up (next to my mom who died before ds was born). I don’t live there anymore and neither do my siblings. Ds was wondering if I would want to be buried there or where we live now. We have no other family here and who knows where kids will end up. I totally understand your dilemma, op, but if you and your sibling are in MD, it does make sense. Plus the logistics of getting back to the original state for a funeral when the second parent is unwell...if they want to be near you, I think you should honor their wishes. I’m sorry you are going through this. It’s tough. I hope you find a nice place. I remember that gave my dad a bit of comfort many many years ago after my mom died. |
I think it makes sense to have them buried near you. Working on a will and while I mentioned a preferred burial spot I also said that family could make the determination if it made more sense to bury me where they could visit grave etc. it sounds like your parents prefer to be buried near where you live and I would respect those wishes. |
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It depends on what you want to spend but you can either buy plots that someone is trying to sell or call the cemetery directly.
We choose one in VA further out due to cost but the cemetery was lovely and more affordable. Duck Run. They were fantastic to deal with and talked us through it all as I had no idea what I was doing but they only do natural burials or cremation in specific urns. |
| Ask your clergy leader. Many churches and synagogues have, for lack of a better word, group plans. If you buy through them, you get a discount. |
Cremation and then make the ash into a diamond/gem |
New poster here My parents are going to be cremated. My mom is in the end stages of alzheimer's with dementia so it's a topic that has come up a lot. My dad has decided to have her ashes interred a their closest military cemetery. They are eligible because he spent a few years in the military in his 20's, but this decision really surprised me because it never really seemed to be an important or defining time of his life--at least the way he described it. The cemetery is over an hour drive from where he lives now (and even further than where my siblings and I live), so it's not particularly convenient, and there are many other cemeteries much closer. |
| If they are going to be in this area then it might make sense to find a cemetery nearby. I’d call around and see what prices are. Prices are high so you might want to shop around. And go and visit to see if the cemetery is well maintained. |
Its free, that's why he's doing it. |
| Gates of Heaven in Aspen Hill has availability. |
That would make sense, but not in my Dad's case. I posted on here about a month ago about how in his old age he is literally throwing money away. Right now he is definitely not in a frame of mind where his looking for good deals/free. Now that I think about it though, and kind of in context with OP's post, I'm wondering if it's just because he feels like it's a place he can "belong" as opposed to just a random cemetery near them. His parents were also cremated but had their ashes scattered, so there is no place with familial significance for him. |