How quickly did you start trying again after loss?

[Anonymous]

Anyone who has experienced miscarriage or stillbirth, how soon did you start trying after your loss? I'm curious when you were cleared physically but also felt mentally ready to start again. What factors contributed to your decision?

[Anonymous]

I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks. We waited one cycle and tried again. I was 36 and trying to get pregnant for the first time so I didn't want to waste any time. It's different for everyone, wait until your doctor clears you and when you mentally are prepared.

[Anonymous]

Miscarriage at 9 weeks. Waited two cycles - per my RE and then tried again. Got pregnant two cycles after that, so 4 cycles from loss. I was ready because I wanted to be pregnant so badly. But emotionally every step of that pregnancy felt like I still couldn't relax. 2 years later, pregnant but miscarried at 7 weeks. Got pregnant next cycle - like two weeks after miscarriage. That was a surprise and a shock. Still same feelings of nervous and no milestone felt safe. Then COVID hit, baby had growth concerns, then was breech and I had to wrap head around c section and worry that I would go into quick spontaneous labor breech while on a blood thinner.

Anyway -- really long way to say. Felt physically able immediately after and wanted it so much. Emotionally was ready to have my baby but emotionally raw the whole time. Still get twinges of sad on the due dates for the losses and on the days of the miscarriages. Not sure that will go away

[Anonymous]

Not planned but the due date was hard. I drank too much. Ended up getting pregnant that weekend. As I said, not planned, but I was happy it turned out that way.

[Anonymous]

Miscarriage at 13 weeks. We didn't wait...at all. In fact my hormones never returned to "normal". I was pregnant again within four weeks.

Not the norm I know. But that was our experience....

[Anonymous]

Was pregnant w/in 4 weeks after miscarriage/DNC. Gorgeous baby girl

[Anonymous]

Had a MC, got pregnant again 2nd cycle, had another MC...doc said my body likely wasn't ready. I wish i'd waited longer

[Anonymous]

I had 2 early miscarriages (1 was a "chemical" pregnancy where I was only pregnant for like a minute). For the first one, waited 1 cycle to make sure I got a period again so I could track stuff correctly. For the second one, I was told by doctors to wait 3 months before trying again. This advice is somewhat controversial, so I only waited 1 cycle again. I wasn't mentally ready right after - I remember crying a lot at Thanksgiving from seeing all the kids playing at a dinner gathering- but it didn't take long.

Took me a couple months to get pregnant after that, but all total, about 5 cycles of active trying to get to a successful pregnancy. Result of said pregnancy is napping at the moment.

Best of luck, OP. Miscarriages are awful. You have my empathy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anyway -- really long way to say. Felt physically able immediately after and wanted it so much. Emotionally was ready to have my baby but emotionally raw the whole time. Still get twinges of sad on the due dates for the losses and on the days of the miscarriages. Not sure that will go away

I think it fades but doesn't ever really go away. I still get sad on Oct 19 for my lost little one. Even though I have a very much alive and loved little one now.

[Anonymous]

3 years after a late term loss. I needed to heal. I was completely broken and lost.
One cycle after a MC at 8 weeks as per my OB.

[Anonymous]

Lost first pregnancy, twins from IVF, at 21 weeks. Waited 5 months to try transfer again. Took 3 transfer cycles (transferring one at a time--not two after what happened)--to get pregnant again--so almost 8 months from loss to being pregnant again. Pregnancy was incredibly stressful for first 20 weeks--bleeding the entire time and I was still an emotional wreck from losing the twins. Fine for 8 weeks, then the unexplained contractions started. Made it to 37 weeks and now have a healthy 17 year old with pretty bad anxiety, which I feel I must have passed on during my stress-filled pregnancy. I so wish I had found a way to look forward during my pregnancy instead of the constant worry. The 18th birthday of my twins is coming up next week. It's one of those days that sometimes weighs heavily on me, while others, it will be halfway through the day when I realize, oh, this is why I've been feeling a little down today--just a sub-conscious thing. Sadly, it's also the birthday of my now deceased sibling, which doesn't help. Anyway, long story--but short answer: it's really different for everyone and I think especially how far along you were at the loss plays a part. Deliving breathing babies is a bigger physical and emotional recovery than a first-tri miscarriage, but either way, I think it's important to focus on looking forward whenever it is time.

[Anonymous]

Second cycle after an early miscarriage. I’m due next month!

[Anonymous]

I think for many people, the length of time spent pregnant is a factor. I know we are supposed to allow all losses the same room for grief, but in my own experience and the experiences of people I'm close to who have suffered early and late term losses, the later ones took much much longer to emotionally recover from.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Miscarriage at 13 weeks. We didn't wait...at all. In fact my hormones never returned to "normal". I was pregnant again within four weeks.

Not the norm I know. But that was our experience....

Miscarried at 7ish weeks (not the same as 13 I know) and was pregnant again before I got my period.

[Anonymous]

Stillbirth at 40weeks during labor. I got my period back 8 weeks later. I was cleared to start trying at 6 months by the MFM (though they told me I really could try earlier if I wanted). I felt ready emotionally to start at 9 months. We got pregnant the first try. It was a pretty anxious pregnancy.