Men and PMS

[Anonymous]

Men what are your thoughts on PMS? Are you understanding when your partner has it? Should she give you a heads up? What are your coping mechanisms?

[Anonymous]

I'm not a guy, but I get PMDD/super depressed, plus bad cramps for a day or two. My partner knows to give me some extra care and will handle dinner while I hang out on the couch or take a bath. He knows I need to cry a lot so he'll hold me while I let it all out. Oh, and he tells me I'm pretty, even though I'm a bloated, sobbing mess, ha.

I don't really get angry or irritable, but if I did, I'd just ask him for some space and he'd give it to me.

[Anonymous]

I'm understanding if she's self-aware. If she recognizes that she's cranky because of her body's chemicals, I'm much more understanding than if she blames it on me.

[Anonymous]

It depends. I call her symptoms the 5 C’s: crying, cleaning, controlling, criticizing, complaining. My baseline is to be empathetic, try to clean and organize and give her space, cook more for her, have a little ice cream on hand without making it obvious I know what’s up (She HATES that). Try to be affectionate, but after kids especially she just doesn’t want to be touched.

If we’re talking 3-4 days of symptoms, I ride it out ok. During really bad months where there is more of the controlling, criticizing, and complaining, or even worse if it’s one of those cycles where the symptoms seem to last for seven days or more, there’s a danger that I’ll roll my eyes and snap because she’s been pissing me off for the last several days, and I’ve been gritting my teeth and bearing it with not a word of thanks. Then she gets mad at me for my reaction. I can’t win.
I have learned to NEVER argue with her when she’s hormonal, even if she says things that simply aren’t true.

So in short, I detest PMS, it’s one of the worst things about our relationship, but after 15 years I have found some coping mechanisms.

The week after the symptoms end is amazing. She is so happy and funny and back to normal. I’ve also found that there is point mid cycle where she goes crazy for a couple of days too.

[Anonymous]

It is more tolerable if you are still willing to have sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It depends. I call her symptoms the 5 C’s: crying, cleaning, controlling, criticizing, complaining. My baseline is to be empathetic, try to clean and organize and give her space, cook more for her, have a little ice cream on hand without making it obvious I know what’s up (She HATES that). Try to be affectionate, but after kids especially she just doesn’t want to be touched.

If we’re talking 3-4 days of symptoms, I ride it out ok. During really bad months where there is more of the controlling, criticizing, and complaining, or even worse if it’s one of those cycles where the symptoms seem to last for seven days or more, there’s a danger that I’ll roll my eyes and snap because she’s been pissing me off for the last several days, and I’ve been gritting my teeth and bearing it with not a word of thanks. Then she gets mad at me for my reaction. I can’t win.
I have learned to NEVER argue with her when she’s hormonal, even if she says things that simply aren’t true.

So in short, I detest PMS, it’s one of the worst things about our relationship, but after 15 years I have found some coping mechanisms.

The week after the symptoms end is amazing. She is so happy and funny and back to normal. I’ve also found that there is point mid cycle where she goes crazy for a couple of days too.

Yeah, right after ovulation. It's a nightmare being a woman, especially in her 40's.

[Anonymous]

PMS stands for, pack my suitcase. Enough said.