15 month not sleeping through the night

[Anonymous]

Hello everyone,

Has everyone experience with a baby/toddler with significant sleep issues? My son is now 15 months. During his first 6 months, he never slept more than 3 hours in a row at night. Naps were short and he didn't sleep enough during the day neither. When he turned 6 months, he started sleeping through the night but at around 12 month old he has started waking in the middle of the night again, crying and yelling, and waking up the entire family. We are exhausted now. We make sure he goes through the same routine each night and that the room temperature is comfortable. We also make sure he eats enough food. He doesn't nap for more that 1 hour and half during the day. We have tired everything to help him napping more (soothing music, adjusting the light/room temperature) but so far nothing has worked.

Any advice appreciated!

Thanks!

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry OP, that sounds exhausting. Does he go to sleep by himself at bedtime or do you help him falls asleep (eg rocking to sleep)?

[Anonymous]

Yes. My 24 month old has always been "low sleep needs". It's awful. We tried everything, every book, sleep consultants, you name it. It did get significantly better around 20 months but she's going through another regression now. I know it's her because we have a 9 month old who sleeps like a dream, never had to sleep train, sleeps 15 hours a day and puts himself down.

I used to think it was me, I was the problem, but some kids are just hardwired like this. My solution is just to let them cry. My ped has always told me some kids just need to let it out before sleeping.

We moved her to a toddler bed early and that helped, she didn't feel as trapped in the crib. She wanders around now but doesn't scream as much. We have an ok to wake clock too.

[Anonymous]

Is it teething? My son is a terrible teether. If it's not teething, it might be after effects of teething - like, he now associates his crib with tooth pain.

Or maybe separation anxiety?

What time is bedtime? Is it too early? I know I sound crazy, but maybe just try a later bedtime. I know an early bedtime is considered sacred, and with my first child I always did one, but either Ferber or Weissbluth says a later can be the solution for a kid whose up for a long period of time in the middle of the night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hello everyone,

Has everyone experience with a baby/toddler with significant sleep issues? My son is now 15 months. During his first 6 months, he never slept more than 3 hours in a row at night. Naps were short and he didn't sleep enough during the day neither. When he turned 6 months, he started sleeping through the night but at around 12 month old he has started waking in the middle of the night again, crying and yelling, and waking up the entire family. We are exhausted now. We make sure he goes through the same routine each night and that the room temperature is comfortable. We also make sure he eats enough food. He doesn't nap for more that 1 hour and half during the day. We have tired everything to help him napping more (soothing music, adjusting the light/room temperature) but so far nothing has worked.

Any advice appreciated!

Thanks!

Not that you'll get this response here in DCUM normally but that isnt "sleep issues" thats just your baby and honestly, a normal one at that. How much are you expecting him to sleep total? Does he wake up 1-2 in the night or every 3 hours still? As a very gentle reminder, sleeping through the night is anywhere from 5-8 hours in baby sleep research not the 10-12 hours propagandized by baby sleep trainers. If they said 5-8 hours was expected then most wouldn't need their services.
Mine didnt sleep from bedtime to waketime all the way through (10+ hours) until 2.5. He had 5-8 hour stretches since 15 months but regressions and teething always caused more wakeups. Hes 3 and just getting his 2 year molars. Didnt start teething until 14 months so we went from rolling, crawling, walking straight into teething.
Also did you cut the nap to get more sleep at night or was that something HE did?

[Anonymous]

"We moved her to a toddler bed early and that helped, she didn't feel as trapped in the crib. She wanders around now but doesn't scream as much"

OP here. How early did you move your child to the toddler bed?

Thanks everybody for your answers!
My son is not teething now and his sleep has always been like this, whether or not he was teething. I did not cut his daily nap time, he did that. He goes to bed and then wakes up after 1 or 2 hours. Then wakes again around 4 am and sometimes at 5 am again. From then on, he doesn't go back to sleep. We don't go to his room, we let him self-soothe but he is waking up everybody as he can go on for hours crying and yelling. We have another kid and he is waking him up too.
Our pediatrician has not been very helpful, she just suggested to let him cry until he falls asleep again, which doesn't address the issue of disrupting everybody's sleep.

Another problem is that, when he is awake, he never wants to be alone, this is for sure. Someone needs to be with him all the time when he is awake or he will cry and yell the all time. This adds to the exhaustion. I don't know if it is separation anxiety.... but how do you deal with that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"We moved her to a toddler bed early and that helped, she didn't feel as trapped in the crib. She wanders around now but doesn't scream as much"

OP here. How early did you move your child to the toddler bed?

Thanks everybody for your answers!
My son is not teething now and his sleep has always been like this, whether or not he was teething. I did not cut his daily nap time, he did that. He goes to bed and then wakes up after 1 or 2 hours. Then wakes again around 4 am and sometimes at 5 am again. From then on, he doesn't go back to sleep. We don't go to his room, we let him self-soothe but he is waking up everybody as he can go on for hours crying and yelling. We have another kid and he is waking him up too.
Our pediatrician has not been very helpful, she just suggested to let him cry until he falls asleep again, which doesn't address the issue of disrupting everybody's sleep.

Another problem is that, when he is awake, he never wants to be alone, this is for sure. Someone needs to be with him all the time when he is awake or he will cry and yell the all time. This adds to the exhaustion. I don't know if it is separation anxiety.... but how do you deal with that?

I'm the PP with the low sleep needs kid. Our kids are incredibly alike, down to the not wanting to be alone thing. I chalk it up to extreme extroversion. I didn't even realize that letting a baby sit by itself to play was a thing till I had my second. My DD HAS to have someone next to her at all times or she cries.

We moved her to a toddler bed around 18 months? She was able to get in and out of it no problem. We baby proofed the room and have a camera on her. She has a few books but no toys. She can even turn on her light. She wanders around, talks to her stuffed animals, looks at books. It's been good. The only thing is she will still scream sometimes for someone to come in but we are working on that with our Hatch ok to wake clock.

To the PP who said this is normal- well kind of. Some kids are wired to need less sleep. MOST kids need about 15 hours a day, and about 12 hours consolidated after 12 months. Scientific experts agree on that. Maybe not hippy attachment parenting "experts" but legitimate child sleep doctors. That being said...some (very few) kids don't sleep. There's nothing you can do but help them learn that sometimes we have to be quiet in our rooms.

[Anonymous]

No advice just commiseration! My kid is 19 months and will sleep through the night some nights, and many nights wakes crying at least once (and has done this now for months). He wakes up any time from 5 am to 6 am. It sucks. He’s fallen asleep 100% independently for many, many months at nap and bed so it’s not about that. Will be checking back to this thread for ideas!

[Anonymous]

Yeah my hippy resource is the national sleep foundation but OK.

https://www.sleepfoundation.org/press-release/national-sleep-foundation-recommends-new-sleep-times

1-2 years is 11 to 14 hours so not 12 hours consolidated sleep. If your kid is getting 9.5 hours at night total and 1.5 nap then they meet this average distribution. A good friend of mine has a very bright low sleep needs kid. She dropped to 0 naps at 2/2.5 and sleep 7/730-5/530. She's never slept past 630. At 3 she is on the low end but still within normal range.

A hippy suggestion is 1oz of tart cherry juice in AM and PM. Tart cherry juice is high in exogenous melatonin and for adults with insomnia led to 60-90 more minutes of sleep.

I'd also say that the more you pull away the more separation anxiety will increase. Meet them where their needs are. All kids are not the same and some really do need a lot more attention/physical contact.

Just for S&G have you ever let him bedshare after he wakes to see if it helps?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yeah my hippy resource is the national sleep foundation but OK.

https://www.sleepfoundation.org/press-release/national-sleep-foundation-recommends-new-sleep-times

1-2 years is 11 to 14 hours so not 12 hours consolidated sleep. If your kid is getting 9.5 hours at night total and 1.5 nap then they meet this average distribution. A good friend of mine has a very bright low sleep needs kid. She dropped to 0 naps at 2/2.5 and sleep 7/730-5/530. She's never slept past 630. At 3 she is on the low end but still within normal range.

A hippy suggestion is 1oz of tart cherry juice in AM and PM. Tart cherry juice is high in exogenous melatonin and for adults with insomnia led to 60-90 more minutes of sleep.

I'd also say that the more you pull away the more separation anxiety will increase. Meet them where their needs are. All kids are not the same and some really do need a lot more attention/physical contact.

Just for S&G have you ever let him bedshare after he wakes to see if it helps?

The National Sleep Foundation is a mattress industry lobbying group. Besides that, where in the information you provided does it say 15 month olds DON'T need consolidated night sleep?

I will stick with the experts in their field, Weissbluth and Ferber, as well as countless others who have made their careers in pediatric sleep science. Not doctors with no research backgrounds who get paid a nice fee to lend their name to a junk fake "foundation" that has ENDORSED THE "MY PILLOW" AS ITS OFFICIAL PILLOW, whatever that means.

[Anonymous]

You need to re sleep train. Sounds like teething broke your cycle and you need to get back on it.

[Anonymous]

NP who also had a VERY challenging non-sleeper. We moved DS to a floor bed at 19 months and it made a tremendous difference. Apparently he "just" hated the crib. We went from multiple wake ups every night (with me usually saying "screw it!" around 3 am and letting him co-sleep), to no or one wake up almost immediately. And if he woke at 5, which was often because he seems to be a hard-wired early riser, bringing him into bed usually got us another 60-90 minutes of sleep.

People thought we were crazy. WE thought we were crazy! But it worked. And he never wandered, which we still marvel at. Just secure any furniture, remove anything you don't want kid to get into, and off you go.

[Anonymous]

We had this around 18 months. It was always between midnight and 1am. We had to do Ferber extinction. Nothing else worked (we tried it!) weird thing was that he was a great sleeping baby.

I’m a crib fanatic and my kids were extremely active kids. It wasn’t safe for them to wander the house before 3.5 so we kept them in cribs. Crib tents if needed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had this around 18 months. It was always between midnight and 1am. We had to do Ferber extinction. Nothing else worked (we tried it!) weird thing was that he was a great sleeping baby.

I’m a crib fanatic and my kids were extremely active kids. It wasn’t safe for them to wander the house before 3.5 so we kept them in cribs. Crib tents if needed.

I'm the PP with the young toddler in a crib. I don't understand this...just baby proof the room and shut the door. Do you think my kid is wandering around the house?

[Anonymous]

We just hit a sleep regression around 15 mo. after our child had been sleeping through the night without issue for months. We are coming out of it now and have tried a few things to help. It could just be a coincidence or the timing, but just in case it helps... 1. We make a point of trying to get outside at least once during the day to walk around, explore, and get some energy out. Seems to have sooo much energy at this age! 2. We also started doing 10-15 minutes of quiet/wind down time in his room before beginning our bedtime routine - it seemed to help switch gears. You may be doing these things already, but just thought I would share as they seem to have made a difference for us!

Good luck, I know it’s so tiring.