Go for a third?
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Anonymous
| I have twin daughters who are now 5, conceived by IVF. I always imagined myself with three kids and am wondering if we should just go for it? Money isn’t an issue but I’m not sure that I can deal with the emotional rollercoaster again. |
Anonymous
| Money not being an issue takes a lot of stress off your back. Also already having children also eases things, of course it would be still stressful. I am saying you are better off second time than your first. Remember there is no wrong decision here, whatever you decide is the right decision. |
Anonymous
|
About to give birth to my third (third singleton pregnancy). Round 2 was much, much easier in the sense that there just felt like a lot less pressure to get it right. Granted, we had a lot of losses along the way- we've done FETs and then another full round- but even those somehow felt easier when I could go home to my one (or two) children.
I will say this third pregnancy feels slightly harder because I'm older now (obviously) but my guess is it's still easier than a twin pregnancy! |
Anonymous
| I think a singleton would feel easy after twins |
Anonymous
| IVF is emotional, but for me, the second round was a lot less stressful just because I knew the routine and what to expect as far as protocols and side effects. |
Anonymous
|
I wouldn’t want to be the much younger sibling of twins. I am the youngest of three.
Unless maybe they are boy girl twins. |
Anonymous
| What if you have twins again? Can you afford 4? |
Anonymous
THIS |
Anonymous
|
As someone with secondary infertility now, Second time is easier if you know what protocols will work and you have success quickly. If it isn’t working and you really want that baby (not, we’ll see and if it works it works), it’s just as hard as the first time.
OP, what’s your diagnosis and how many rounds did the first pregnancy take? How old are you now? A lot can change in 6 years... |
Anonymous
This. We went for the third and initially it was IVF bonus baby! No stress! If it works it works. Once we got into it though, I really wanted that baby and it became very stressful. It’s not east to stay easy breezy when injecting yourself daily. It didn’t work and we got over it eventually but... I wouldn’t do it again looking back. |
Anonymous
Original PP here. Hugs and yes, totally agree. We knew our odds with IVF were low and had the conversations about how many rounds to try and when to stop. Went in totally saying we would give it our best shot so we could know we tried our best. Nope. Once we started the process, we got really attached to the idea of that baby and it became VERY hard to let go of that dream. For us it was a second, so we were also giving up on the whole sibling thing and guilt with not being able to give that relationship to our child, which is a little more added complexity than giving up on the idea of another wanted baby. But regardless, I really would think hard on how you'd feel if it didn't work and what impact that would have on your currently family. It's very hard to stop treatment without having success. |
Anonymous
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a singleton will feel so freeing and easy after twins! I had 2.9 toddler still in diapers when I had my twins, and that was hard (money buys help, tho)
I have friends who had the same, and then had a fourth singleton--and once it happened to me, I know why they went for the 4th! Put that baby on your hip and go! As for the IVF part of it, yes, a repeat of your successful protocol will likely get you pg again. That's what happened to me. |
Anonymous
| Yes, but don’t transfer more than one embryo at a time for so many reasons. |
Anonymous
| NP here - go for it but understand that you may get nothing. I have a 4 year old DD from my 3rd transfer round - I never thought I would NEED another child but alas have spent 3 years unsuccessful for a sibling - same protocol, new protocols, new clinic - Its been crazy. I'm exhausted. trying one more time. never thought i would be here. |